The Daily Adventures of a Fat Girl in Flip Flops

Looks funky, but so tasty...

2012-02-09T21:50:00.001-05:00

Cherry almond clif bar. Yum! One of my fave snacks/meal replacements on the run.

And a crazy dinner salad concoction - avocado with cherry tomatoes, salsa, cut up string cheese and pepper and garlic powder. Surprisingly tasty as well! (I admit it looks like vomit in a bowl. New name? Vomit salad!)

Eleven Things...

2012-02-09T13:09:00.000-05:00

Poise in Parma recently posted this meme and said we could "consider ourselves tagged" if we wanted to participate. Ok!

11 random things:

1. I love Halloween. It's my fave holiday. It's an even bigger deal to me now that I work at a haunted house as an actor (and this year I get to do make-up, woohoo!)

2. Working at a haunted house does not make me any less scared of going through them. I'm a chicken. Can't watch horror movies either.
3. I could eat sushi, Taco Bell, chinese or Indian food everyday and be totally happy. (Though I may need a chocolate fix now and then)
4. I talk to my 3 cats like they can understand me. They are our furry children and they seem to be ok with my kind of crazy. Thankfully my husband is ok with it, too. I also "make" them sing for their supper and play fetch. (as if you can make a cat do anything it doesn't want to)

5. I'm a gastric bypass patient and I've lost 155 lbs so far. I'm stll a chunky chick and get funny looks when I eat like a bird out in public. I always feel like I have to reassure people that the food was good, I'm just full. I don't think they always believe me.
6. My most girly attribute is I love painting my nails, but sadly I also bite them when I'm stressed. really trying to break that habit again this year so I can use some of the super-sweet ideas I've seen on Pinterest.
7. I'm a Christian, I love God and help with the youth group at our church. I feel like I can relate to the kids because I know I have to keep growing in my faith and I will always have a lot to learn. I still struggle with being comfortable praying out loud or accepting that I won't always have the answer or know what to do. But I'm pretty sure that's why it's called "faith" not "easy".

8. I have a collection of those fun neon-colored clip in hair extensions that i wear randomly. This is just one example of why I doubt I'll ever grown up totally.

9. I probably own more zebra print clothing and accessories than I should. I love it. My wedding dress had zebra print incorporated into it.
10. I have the best darn husband a girl could ever ask for. I love that we can do anything together and have fun. We understand our warpedness/randomness/squirrel moments and appreciate them. The only time this sucks is when we're cooking - because we don't follow recipes and never write down what we did, so if we love something trying to recreate it exactly is never going to happen.

11. I'm training for the Rite Aid Marathon 5K again this year. This time I'm going to run the whole way! (Someone should probably wait for me at the finish line with oxygen and some coffee-flavored gatorade) have to admit that running is a lot les

Additional questions from post:

What is the most adventurous thing you have ever eaten?

Beef heart bruschetta at Lolita (Was super tasty) or sour cream and onion crickets (not so tasty)

What would your last meal be if you had a say in it?

As much sushi as I could scarf and a divine chocolate dessert.

What is your all time guilty pleasure food?

What are you currently listening to?

A crazy mix of Christian artists and top 40 music that would confuse most people.

What is your favorite sport (to play, watch, or both)?

To play - volleyball. To watch - Football.
One thing you are dying to try (this could be anything)

I really want a tattoo! Just need to commit to what I want o I want it to be. Leaning towards getting a permanent wedding band or an old-school gerdening book illustration of catnip right now (if you knew my maiden and married last names, this would make a lot more sense to you)
Fill in the blank: Food makes me _________.

inspired, full and creative!

If you could have dinner with just one person, dead or alive, who would it be?

My grandfather. He passed away when I was in 8th grade and I still miss him everyday.
What is your “go to” restaurant for taking out of towners?

I can't just pick one! Melt, Pacific East, Farenheit, Momma Roberto's in Mentor, Rocky River Brewing Company, Joe's Deli - just depends on mood and side of town we're on.

What is your favorite holiday?

HALLOWEEN.

What quote sums up your life right now?

“Ya ehnnah!" (Only my hubby will understand)
If you want to answer these yourself, consider yourself tagged!

Cracks me up....

2011-09-28T15:11:00.002-04:00

Gotta love BBC

Photos from Lady Gaga concert

2011-05-12T15:20:00.000-04:00

My fiancée helped me make an uber-fabulous dress for the recent Lady Gaga concert at the Q. It was sooooo much fun!

Link to my professional photo on the tour website coming soon!!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Pizza soup for church soup sale

2011-05-11T17:11:00.000-04:00

We cooked up a pot of this for the church soup and bake sale. Like a cross between liquid pizza and chili. The fresh mozzarella melted on top from Gallucci's took it to the next level. So easy to make! We also made orange creamsicle and peanut butter cup cake pops.

Pizza Soup

2 cans kidney beans, drained & rinsed
1 jar pizza sauce
1 - 2 cups diced onions and bell peppers (cooked to tender)
1 can sliced mushrooms
1 can diced Italian tomatoes
1 lb cooked crumbled Italian sausage (we used turkey sausage)
1 bag pepperoni slices diced
2 cups chicken stock
Any italian spices you want, to taste (we used garlic, oregano, basil and lots of black pepper)

Toss it all in a crock pot, stir and cook on low for 4 to 6 hrs stirring occasionally. Serve with breadsticks for dunking and mozzarella melted on top!

Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

And she's back...

2011-03-24T14:40:00.000-04:00

Hoping to jump in the band wagon of blogging again and hopefully going to drag my future hubby along with me as we break in our shiny new blog! I'll be posting here, he'll be posting there. I'll share the link later!

I'm stealing an idea from the fabulous Katy at "Katching up with Katy" and I'll be attempting to post on the following topics:
Day 1-Introduce, recent picture, 15 interesting facts

Day 2-Meaning behind your blog name

Day 3-Your first love

Day 4-Your parents

Day 5-Your siblings

Day 6-A picture of something that makes you happy

Day 7-Favorite movies

Day 8-A place you've traveled to

Day 9-A picture of your friends

Day 10-Something you're afraid of

Day 11-Favorite TV shows

Day 12-What you believe

Day 13-Goals

Day 14-A picture you love

Day 15-Bible verse

Day 16-Dream house

Day 17-Something you're looking forward to

Day 18-Something you regret

Day 19-Something you miss

Day 20-Nicknames

Day 21-Picture of yourself

Day 22-Favorite city

Day 23-Favorite vacation

Day 24-Something you've learned

Day 25-Put your iPod on shuffle, first 10 songs

Day 26-Picture of your family

Day 27-Pets

Day 28-Something that stresses you out

Day 29-3 Wishes

Day 30-a picture

You can win a kitchen aid mixer (and make me super jealous!)

2010-12-15T13:06:00.000-05:00

I entered... you should too, but only if you don't win because it may make me cry. LoL In all seriousness, the recipes sound delish and the blog this girl writes is great! (and if you win, you could always be a super-sweetie and give it to us as a wedding gift and I promise to cook you a disgusting amount of food as thanks...hint hint.)

3 Kids and Us and KitchenAid want to make your holiday wish come true and offer you the chance to win a brand new KitchenAid Artisan Stand Mixer, in your choice of over 20 colors, valued at $349.99!

Enter the KitchenAid Stand Mixer Giveaway and check out the Homemade Holiday Feast recipes that show all the ways the KitchenAid Stand Mixer and attachments can be used to create unique family dishes and save you counter space with one appliance that can be converted to meet your every need.

I'm thinking if I win some cranberry and turkey sausage may be in order or some cranberry pumpkin ice cream using some of those fab attachments. Mmmmmmm....

For those that don't know...

2010-10-18T13:34:00.005-04:00

I'm 31 years old. I've been fat my entire life. In May of this year I took some drastic steps to change that for health reasons. I had Roux-en-Y Gastric Bypass surgery. I have since lost over 100 lbs - and I have a lot more to go. It's amazing and I am feeling better each day - my knees and ankles no longer ache. And slowly, my hips are catching up to the no-pain zone, too.

Right now I'm struggling. I'm at a plateau, I'm better able to handle food in my little stomach pouch and hunger has returned. It's scary. I don't want to mess up what I've done so far.

So many people think the surgery is a magic fix, but it's not. It's just a tool. I still need to watch what I eat and exercise in order for it to work. It hurts me when people say I took the easy way out. It's NOT easy. I still get sick after eating the strangest things. I still have days when nothing sounds good. I still am losing my hair. I still have to take multivitamins and suppliments everyday for the rest of my life so I get enough nutrients.

Also, I'm struggling with how I look now. Yes, I'm smaller, but I look like I'm starting to melt - literally. It's not attractive. And I'm afraid to buy clothes because I'm afraid I will lose more weight and have wasted money or won't lose anymore weight and will have to go back to the fatty pants. I've bought 1 dress, 1 pair of jeans, 1 top shaper, 1 bottom shaper, 1 shirt, 1 skirt and a sweater. Evrything else is from pre-surgery weight and it's super baggy on me. It only adds to my feeling of being a melting snowman or candle.

Those that know me - thank you for the kind words and comments that I'm doing a good job. It seems lame, but they are needed sometimes. It helps to know other people see me as changing in a good way. Just know I'm struggling and have some patience with me. This will pass, I know it will.

Testing iPhone posting...

2010-09-30T10:54:00.001-04:00

Long time, no post. Going that having a nice mobile option for sharing my blog thoughts will change that. Lots of amazing changes going on in my life that I can't wait to share!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Check it out - Lauren's Hope (I know I need one post-WLS)

2010-08-04T15:27:00.005-04:00

I know that I need to get one of these now that I am a post WLS Gastric Bypass patient. Too many things a doctor needs to know about me if I'm passed out an unable to talk. I've been waffrling on whether or not to get one because they all seem kind of ugly/plain, but the medical alert items on this site are kinda cute and trendy. The kids stuff looks like it would be better for youngins and less traumatic than standard fare as well.

"If you own a WEBSITE or publish a BLOG, we welcome you to link to www.laurenshope.com. If you mention Lauren's Hope on your blog or website and post a permanent link to us, email the URL to: links@laurenshope.com. Once the link has been verified you will receive a 1 time $50 gift certificate."

I'm on a top secret mission...

2009-12-07T13:19:00.002-05:00

Tonight, I shall attempt to take video proof that the light craziness in my neighborhood is spreading like a very slow-moving, blinking swine flu.

The mismatched, unplanned, siezure-inducing nightmare that one neightbor shared last year has spread into his neighbor's yard. Multiple strands of lights with blinking effects, twitching in a festive display of sheer chaos and terror. It's like someone went crazy with a bedazzler on their yards.

Guess I should just be glad they don't diplay an entire gaggle of those blow-up creatures.

Things I remember….

2009-12-03T16:59:00.005-05:00

I remember the fear. The dread. The pain. The anger.

I remember feeling crazy. The kind of crazy that you think can only be solved with booze, drugs and therapy. The kind of crazy you think only lives on trashy TV shows and in best-selling books. The kind of crazy that can’t be explained with mere words.

I remember reading e-mails. The words blurring on the page as they choked me (my heart), and beat me (my soul), and screamed at me (my ears).

Kneeling on the floor of my bathroom, puking, heaving, sobbing. Thinking I should mop more often, start a bonfire with his clothes, buy a new toilet brush, act out a Carrie Underwood song, regrout.

The first time it came out of nowhere. The second, I was in constant fear. The third….the fourth….the ones I never knew about? They tore me apart, smoothly and with skill, brick by brick, till there was nothing left but regret.

Mysterious phone calls in call logs. And the voices on the other line when I confronted. So cautious and cocky at the same time. Like they’d won some prize in a discount lottery. “That’s between you and him. Not me.”

I rebuilt this person, who I am today, one brick at a time. The mortar is damp. The foundation still leveling.

I want it to be something beautiful. Something I can be proud of. Real estate not just anyone can afford. And I promised myself no more bulldozers and demolitions. I deserve at least that much.

------------

I wrote this a long time ago. I remembered it today and just felt it needed shared.

Hate on me, hater. Now or later, 'Cuz I'm gonna do me, you'll be mad baby.

2009-11-30T17:58:00.004-05:00

A few thoughts for the week that will make no sense to anyone but me, mostly.

1. I think the quantities of Diet Coke I've been ingesting (in the lime twist and cherry varities) in the last few years have finally started to eat a hole in my stomach. There's a reason you can use it to clean the terminals on a car battery. UGH. Must chug antacid. Or, it could be turkey and stuffing overload. Ask again next week. I may need to switch to a high H2O intake for a while.

2. You shouldn't open Pandora's box unless you're 100% certain you can accept what's inside. Once it's open, it's impossible to close. Even the people who didn't have a choice in opening the box can't close it.

3. Wikipedia defines an ethical dilemma as: "a complex situation that will often involve an apparent mental conflict between moral imperatives, in which to obey one would result in transgressing another. This is also called an ethical paradox since in moral philosophy, paradox plays a central role in ethics debates." Some days I envy the dumb, pointless lumps of what could be considered humanity that stumble around without a conscious. But only a teeny tiny bit. Then I wake up and smell the reality.

4. Sometimes you love your relatives very, very much but you still wanna smack them upside the head in hopes that it gives them a a ride on the clue train. You can't help someone who doesn't help themselves. I struggle with trying to remember this - I care, but it's no my problem and I can't fix it. (and shouldn't - it's not really my job)

5. Can someone define normal for me? I think I've forgotten what it should look like.

6. I am still in the process of trying to make myself a better person inside and out. I doubt this process ever ends, but some quality milestones would be nice every now and then. One day at a time. One day at a time.

Hope everyone had a good Turkey Day. I played chef for my family and a few friends, and whipped up a turkey (which took 2 boxes of stock and 2 bottles of beer to make - lush turkey with a drinking problem, I tell ya!), ham, mashed taters, sweet tater casserole, green bean casserole (my own recipe) Michael Symon's fried brussel sprouts, homemade gravy, from-scratch cranberry sauce and lazy people's store bought rolls.

My grandmother, the queen of all pastry, made the pumpkin pies. And I visited my fave baker to pick up a dutch cherry pie. (Great Scott's stickers don't lie - it's bakery you'll dream of!)

It went really well and my house hasn't been this clean in ages.

I want an instruction manual!

2009-11-23T18:30:00.002-05:00

And a rules book!

When it comes to men, I don't think I'm totally clueless, but they always find new and surprising ways to confuse/frustrate me.

Why doesn't this get easier as we get older?

This counts for guys you date, are friends with or are related to.

Interesting week....

2009-11-19T17:48:00.002-05:00

Quick recap of FFG's life - still in the same job, living in same house and driving same HHR, dated a boy for a year, broke up with the boy (he 100% did me a favor) hit a deer (story for another time - poor Blu!), still bowling, being goofy with friends, trying to lose weight, get healthy and broaden my horizons as a human being. Oh, and I miss blogging and having near-strangers comment on my life. So, here I am. :-)

Now, onto this week -

Last weekend went on a road trip with friends to Columbus. Met a very interesting boy, got to see friend's get re-engaged officially with a very adorable proposal (I videotaped it), had some retail therapy and played in a whirlpool.

Oh, also had dinner at my cheesy fave chain restaurant, O'Charleys. Let's just say Cotton Candy Cosmos are way yummier than originally thought, and wickedly potent.

In general, it was just nice to escape from Cleveland for a bit. I need to go on another road trip soon - or plan a trip to someplace warm in Jan./Feb. (Maybe Vegas, Florida or Cali....?) I miss checking out new places and trying new things.

At work this week, pulled off a very cool project. I helped create a special dancing flash mob for a licensing announcement. I choreographed a short dance, taught it to about 75 employees from across the company and kept it all secret till it was performed at work. It was a lot of fun to shake things up a bit and get our employees excited/cheerful with something out of the ordinary. Now I just have to brainstorm the next big thing...

Looking forward to a four-day weekend next week, filled with turkey, family and possibly some holiday shopping. I have a pretty short list of people to buy for this year, which is nice. Means I can focus a little more and not feel rushed. Hopefully I can find the perfect items.

Still a TON of projects to work on for the house. Hoping I get my act together in the winter months since I won't be as motivated to run around.

To-do list includes:

- finish stripping wallpaper and paint spare bathroom
- paint/recaulk main bathroom
- convert computer room into fitness/dressing room
- finish organizing craft room (It's a scary disaster - so glad it has a door!)
- get carpets cleaned

Also considering one of those 101 in 1001 days lists. If I can come up with enough stuff, I may post that as a New Year's resolution of sorts.

Also have high hopes I will get a call from a local publication about something a bunch of friends and family nominated me for. (Hello, Cleveland Magazine. I'm cute, funny and gosh darn it people like me! And mt birthday's in Feb. How sweet a b-day gift would that be? )

Dating is fun but it sucks, too.

2009-10-09T15:42:00.005-04:00

I decided to pull this post. Why? Because it sounded bitter, and I'm really not bitter. I was just frustrated. Just like you shouldn't text or call when you're drunk, you shouldn't post or e-mail when cranky.

Thanks...

Illustration Friday - "Hollow"

2009-07-14T19:04:00.002-04:00

This is my contribution to this week's Illustration Friday - "Hollow"

'Cause sometimes mine feels just a little....hollow.

In a cooking mood...

2009-07-14T18:45:00.002-04:00

This was awesomely yummy! 1 pita & garlic hummus from Judy's Oasis at Westside Market + 1 slice Garlic Cheese from Fave Westside Market Cheesemonger (Always forget thir name - but they are down by the streudel and fudge vendors) + diced green peppers, peas, red onion, mushrooms & black beans from the salad bar at work, nuked till the cheese melted. It just sounded good today for no reason. Might have to do this again. (Although, it does have side effects - A vampire wouldn't get within a mile of me today. Stinky, stinky...even with brushing teeth and minty gum)

Going to make Ohio City Pasta Papradelle with diced cherry smoked sausage, a splash of EVOO and a variety of diced veggies (red pepper, mushrooms, onion, sugar snap peas, tomato, zucchini) for dinner tonight. Maybe a drizzle of balsamic to finish it, hmmm....

I love going to the Westside Market on the weekends - totally inspires me to cook all week!

Dance your ass off! (OMG!)

2009-06-24T10:46:00.000-04:00

Current mood: adventurous

I am gonna be a total loser and watch this!

The bald guy, Miles is adorable! And hot damn on that "boom, crack crack boom" move Pinky does. I think my butt would fall on the floor trying to do that.

http://www.oxygen.com/dance/?affiliate=MySpace_DYAO

I could be one of these crazy people, with my danceline background and 8+ years dance training. Oh, they days when I could go from standing to a kick split or from a floor move to standing without thinking about it.

Oi....

I am *almost* tempted to submit a video for their little contest. A free trip would be fun, but I'm not sure it's worth internet ridicule for being a fat lady flopping around to a beat. (Hello? Next Star Wars kid, I don't think so.) Maybe I could just put their music over the top of old footage....? hmmmmm.....

***shake your money makers!***

I haven't blogged too much lately, so I'm hoping some of you are still out there. Question to test - do you like to dance? (in the shower or living room when vaccuming counts) What music gets your toes tapping?

Somewhat Weekly Observations

2009-06-24T10:42:00.002-04:00

Current mood: talkative

Here's a roundup of things that have caught my eye recently...

Interesting article on CNN.com: Is cheating ever deserved? http://bit.ly/10d03N

This article makes me think and bothers me at the same time. I 100% don't think anyone ever deserves to be cheated on. How difficult is it to man up or put on your big girl panties and tell soemone that you're not interested and you want to go off and fiddle around with someone else: emotionally or physically. Please don't give me this "it just happened" BS. We're mostly adults. If crap "just happened" all the time we'd all be dead from not resisting the urge to stick our fingers in a light socket as a kid or eating something poisonous. An excuse is an excuse.

This goes for dating relationships, as well as marriage. Marriage just has an extra layer of "why."

Marriage is a vow between two people in the eyes of God. (and there aren't a lof of things in religion that God requires a vow on) You say you will take a person as your other half for the rest of your life: better or worse, richer or poorer, sickness or health. It doesn't have a get out quick clause, even thought some may treat it that way. If you're asking someone to marry you or you're saying yes too someone that asks, you should think long and hard, because life may not always be the easy/joyful/lady of plenty and health you are currently experiencing. Life happens, even when you're in love.

I think that people have to learn to respect and love eachother and work on things as a team. Why get married if you're still going to maintain the "I'm an individual and what I do affects no one but me." I guess I always thought the points was building something together. I think the way Kate treated Jon on that show was not always respectful or caring. I don't think that is a reason to cheat, but it was a reason to seek help and work on things. Sad to see instead all the craziness has driven them apart.

(Full disclosure - I was cheated on and that may taint my opinion a bit.)

Fat chick clothes - on the market, off the market? http://www.nytimes.com/2009/06/18/fashion/18plus.html

A few weeks ago I saw an article in the NY times talking about a bunch of retailers dropping their plus size sections in stores and only carrying them online. I was bummed. Now, there's an article saying some stores are getting Plus sections and expanding them. Yay for more fashion choices!

Side note to designers: I'm a BIG girl. I know you've always had this vision of fat ladies in stirrup pants and cheesy mumu's with giant floral patterns on them. Please stop. That crap is nasty. If I wanted to look like a giant walking floral hedge, I'd plant my ass in a garden. Try for some trendy solid colors, and drop this fascination you have with shrubbery shit.

Toledo mayor breaks up fight, calls teen 'fatso' http://www.ohio.com/news/break_news/48526277.html

I commend the guy for breaking up the fight. He didn't have to do anything but sit around and twiddle his thumbs, but was it necessary to call the kid fatso? That comment and others like it, is probably why he's so bitter and ready to scrap in the first place.

Slightly Chubby People Live Longer than Skinny People - http://www.clevelandleader.com/node/10367

Suck it skinny chicks! Oh, sorry. (no offense nice/normal/non-lookie uppie downie skinny people - ask if you don't know what that means LoL) Got a bit carried away. Now if only I could get down to the "slightly chubby" end of the spectrum, instead of the "where's my harpoon" one... sigh...

Office people going crazy - http://tr.im/ppbq

These videos are funny to watch but would be scary as hell to live. I do have to wonder why the people stood around and just watched the crazy man at work with a hatchet though. My ass would've ran for the door! Same for the one lady who keeps working while the guy is slamming around his computer. That was the perfect time for a potty break.

Illustration Friday “Craving”

2009-06-05T14:54:00.001-04:00

This is my contribution to this week's Illustration Friday - "Craving"

unmentionables...

2009-04-27T18:33:00.000-04:00

I think I finally know why it takes men less time to get ready than women. It's not the make up and the hair, it's not even the clothes and accessories people can see. It's the underwear. Men only have socks, the occasional undershirt and man panties to worry about. (Note: be prepared for an overshare LoL)

Let's evaluate men's underclothing options.

Socks are easy: 99.9% of them are white. Most guys own a few black pairs for work and dress up (not for mowing the lawn, please!) and that's it. Both options come in different heights, but we don't care which you wear as long as you're not wearing shorts.

Undershirts: Plain white shirts worn under dress or work shirts. I can only guess this is to hide the manly chest hair and keep the pit stains from leeching into the actual shirt. Other than that, someone may need to fill me in.

Undies: If they even wear them, this is the only category where it gets tricky. Most men have 3 style options: boxers, briefs and boxer/briefs. The color choice is predominantly white. (we gals consider ourselves lucky if our man has braved the murky depths of colored underthings. In a perfect world they'd wear black underwear all the time. I'm guessing this would save us a lot of head shaking when doing the laundry. "How did you? What the...?") And boxers can run the gamut - from freebies with beer and soda logos, to cartoons and sports team logos.

Now, with women it's a whole new ballgame. We've got undies, bras, socks/hosiery and sometimes other additional gadgetry to make us look fabulous.

Socks: We like them in colors, and different fabrics, and pantyhose, and knee-highs and with garter belts and fishnets and lines up the back and patterns and textures and some suck us in while others make us look tan.... oi, you get the picture.

Bras: I'm lazy and Wikipedia sums it up for me just fine. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brassiere_designs The wire vs underwire will be a debate till we die. So will front vs back hookers.

Undies: Men are smart. They go for what's comfy. We, on the other hand, have comfy (briefs, bikinis, hi-cuts, boylegs) and devices of torture (thongs, g-strings, crotchless - seriously, what wear anything?) They can tie on the sides, or lace up the back, they come in a plethora of colors and sometimes they have matching bras. (and you look funny in a plaid bra and polka dot panties...)

Misc.: This is crazy territory. Spanx, ASSets, corsets and bustiers (which may be in two categories at the same time. An undies/bra combo) Smoothing tanks and padded butt enhancers. Cutlets and tape. And I'm sure there's other stuff I've never even heard or seen.

And alotta this crap is hand-washable only. Why???

And women - you know exactly what I'm talking about when I say this. You can deny it all you want but we all do it in some fashion. We have "levels" of underwear. From wear and toss because they're on their last legs (kinda like some guy's everyday undies) to "Date night" ensembles for special occasions. When was the last time you heard a man who thought he was gonna get lucky say "Oh, well I better put the special "date night" underwear on. Pshaw!

The choices can make your head spin. It would be way easier if we had all white socks, all tan panty house, all white bras and undies or all black, and were done with it! But, I guess it wouldn't be half as much fun.

Why this rant now?

1. I bought a new bra. Something called a "plunge" bra. You might assume the name is because it has a deep neckline.... but you would be wrong. It's because it pulls your boobs into something that's mythical, like a unicorn. You've heard of it but never seen it except in the Victoria's Secret catalog. They're fluffed and puffed to the point it looks like someone could dive in and swim around for ages in a pool of cleveage. You know it's a bra made by the devil when your mom sees you wearing it and exclaims "Good lord, have they always been that big?" Ladies, I've found bra nirvana and it's illegal in several states. I strongly reccomend you run out and try one of these on ASAP. Gravity be damned!

2. I had an incident with a new sundress this Saturday while taking the plunge bra for a test spin around the local grocery store. I apparently underestimated the wind and the aerodynamics of my dress. As I stepped out of Blu, the whole darn thing flipped up like I was Marilyn Monroe straddling a street grate. Before I could get the disaster under control a woman stepping out of a massive pick up truck started cracking up (I think she was laughing hard enough she may have peed a little) All I could say to her was "glad I could share my underwear with you today!" (At least they were well-covering and cute "date night" style undies) I'm hoping anyone else within viewing distance was distracted enough by the bountiful bosom they missed the rest of the show.

Moral - there is a reason why your mother always said wear nice underwear, and it wasn't just because you might get in an accident and have your jeans cut off. Oneday, you might just step outta your car and become an unwitting member of the Britney Spears-esque ranks. Oh, wait. She didn't wear any underwear.

Welcome to my world....

I couldn't resist...

2009-04-07T17:05:00.001-04:00

Current mood: mischievous

So....Last week in the news you may have seen that Vince "Shamwow" Shlomi (Famous for being the guy on this commercial: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ns4mnmNBk1Y) was arrested for smacking a prostitute http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0327092sham1.html

What you may not know is he's also been seen recently touting another product in a highly entertaining commercial that could explain the whole debacle. (pay close attention to 0:37 to understand my comment below) - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pPKtBM99kAc

Apparently she didn't so he took his own advice about getting rid of troubles....

Weekly observations ('In the News' doesn't cut it)

2009-03-26T17:16:00.002-04:00

Oh my lord! There's too much good stuff to share this week. I need to make more regular posts apparently. Trust me, most of these are at least worth a quick clickie-poo. Check

Mind Of Man: Now Playing—Crappy Love Songs

You must read this post for 3 reasons:

1. I can relate to the topic. Certain songs will always make me think of certain moments or people. It's like a switch that gets turned on in my head. Let's call it the soundtrack of my life.

2. This line is hilarious: "I’m amazed my testicles haven’t withered like yesterday’s birthday balloons."

3. Any man who wants to make out to "Glory Box" by Portishead is alright by me. That's a seriously sexy & seductive song. (See the playlist at the bottom of the post if you've never heard it. Cold shower may be required. You've been warned.)

http://www.thefrisky.com/post/246-mind-of-man-now-playing-crappy-love-songs/?obref=outbrain

Men's sock subscription service launches in US

Are you kidding me? Guys - for that much money, I will seriously go to Wal-Mart once a month and personally buy you a pack of socks. Hell, for $100 more I'll even pick you up a pack of man panties (boxers, briefs or boxer-briefs. No banana hammocks, please. I don't wanna know). I could be a sock-wife for hire! Pimping myself out to the masses for the moola.

http://www.dmnews.com/Sock-subscription-service-launches-in-US/article/129291/

Doctors Say Having Sex Is Like Getting $50,000 Raise

Let's be honest. As soon as you're born, you need money. The whole sex thing is a want, not a need. And it doesn't come into play till you're older and hopefully mature and responsible. A human could live the rest of their lives without nookie, but money is kind of a requirement. That said, am I wrong to say I'd rather have the money? Not that the other isn't nice and doesn't have it's own merits.... but $50,000 a year worth of merits?

http://www.newsnet5.com/health/18940230/detail.html?treets=nn5&tml=nn5_12pm&ts=T&tmi=nn5_12pm_1_11000203162009

When Economy Sours, Tootsie Rolls Soothe Souls

I wonder how much Tootsie paid for that free ad? Wouldn't a more unbiased headline have been "Candies Soothe Soul"? It's true though. Many women have always turned to chocolate and sweets in times of stress. Nice that the rest of the world is finally catching up!

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/03/24/nyregion/24candy.html?_r=1&ref=business

Experts say play time can relieve stress in bad times

Think my neighbors would start talking if I go to the park down the street and played on the swingset? It does sound fun. I'm all for the board games and fun! I miss game nights... sigh

http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/2009-03-23-play-stress_N.htm?csp=DailyBriefing

Built-in Whale Tail

What the heck will they think of next? Are you kidding? They should change the jeans brand name to "Skankies."

http://www.thefrisky.com/post/246-ho-no-they-didnt-thong-jeans/

And since I've assault your reading and listening skills, here's a few images from the news I found fun and beautiful....

Love it! It's an ad duel!

Blackberry shoots Apple:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F0a-rX5XCgk

Apple's response:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-Q6NBp8bCA

When I studied religions in college I always found Buddhism and Hinduism fascinating. Their religious have unique concepts and things like the Holi festival of color are so beautiful (and the people look so happy!): http://www.boston.com/bigpicture/2009/03/holi_the_festival_of_colors.html

I think seeing this float by in downtown Cleveland would make me smile, and freak out just a tiny bit: http://www.daylife.com/photo/05p24LwfpW0TH

Fashion trends from CiCi's

2009-02-19T18:56:00.003-05:00

This emergency fashion update brought to you by the fine people who eat at CiCis in Ridge Park Square. Your roving reporter was not able to catch the full effect of the outfit on film, so let us describe:

Hair done, fake nails painted and primped, full makeup, short purple velvet dress, purple faux fur coat (unless there is a very naked, very cold purple rabbit somewhere), purple hose, and a pair of freebie hotel logo slippers in white.

Be sure you hop on this trend now, before you're left in the fashionable dust!

Why we're all crazy...

2009-02-19T18:55:00.002-05:00

Have you ever watched a movie and found in entertaining, but slightly uncomfortable at the same time?

Dragged my mom out to see a late showing of “He’s Just Not That Into You” this weekend on Valentine’s Day. Thought a little romantic comedy/chick flick was the perfect this for this unholiest of days for singletons. I may have been slightly mistaken.

I read the book a while back as one of my guilty pleasure chick lit readings, in between serious Bibliophilia ventures. For some reason the book didn’t impact me as much as the movie. This could be for several reasons:

• Current relationship status is different than my status at time of reading the book.

• Live action is more convincing than simple words on a page that must be interpreted by my feeble mind.

• I was in denial.

But before I get too far ahead of myself, let’s examine the movie from a non-emotional state. It’s a very cute movie with good acting and well-timed humor. Highly recommend it for your next night out with the girls. The storyline is fun and there are some great lines in the movie that had people cracking up and nodding their heads in agreement. Eye candy-wise the movie is a winner for both genders. Even though he looks like he needs a cookie, Bradley Cooper is seriously hot; Justin Long is still the geeky girls drool object as a residual from his Mac ads; and even though he’s not my cup of tea, most girls will be happy to see Ben Affleck make his appearances. For the guys, my long-time girl crush Drew Barrymore is cute as ever, but sadly makes far too few appearances. She is joined by my newest girl crush Ginnifer Goodwin. I always liked her in “Big Love” but in this movie she’s so freakin’ adorable it’s disgusting (great hair, fun nail polish). And of course Jennifer Aniston, Jennifer Connelly and Scarlett Johansson are classic-looking hotties I cannot imagine any man kicking out of bed.

***Spoilers below this line***

So, why would a funny movie like this make me uncomfortable? As Gigi started her first date recap with coworkers, I choked a little on my Diet Pepsi and had a, “Holy crap, that’s me and my friends” moment. And for the next hour and a half I kept having this odd feeling of dejavu.

When Beth has a discussion with Ben about marriage and he retorts with the “why do you need a piece of paper to justify what we feel/have” I scooted down in my seat and started fiddling with my drink straw. When Janine suddenly cracks over her husband’s lying and infidelity and throws his clothes erratically around the room and smashes a mirror, only to clean up the mess and neatly fold everything, I visibly twitched. And when Mary laments the days of single phone lines and answering machines, and talks about having to view multiple types of technology to get rejected and talks about MySpace being the new booty call, I laughed a knowing laugh and shook my head. I could even relate to Kevin Connolly taking Anna to the house he was thinking of purchasing and telling her he didn’t want to buy it unless he knew she could see herself living there someday, too.

Talk about empathy. At some point in the last few years, I have gone through similar things and felt the same way these fictional characters felt.

Right now I am fully immersed in my Gigi phase. Oh the things I have picked apart and attempted to interpret with my pals. The dialog in the movie could have easily been transcribed from some of my own conversations. (just replace alcohol with coffee or soda) Part of me feels guilty about it and another part feels vindicated because I’m obviously not alone. The gasps and oh craps from women around the theater that night attest to it. It was like an AA meeting where we didn’t have to stand up and confess to know that we’re all guilty and need help. (Big kudos the crazy drunk woman who was very blunt with her outbursts and made the entire theater feel better about theirs)

I know it looks crazy to outsiders because it feels crazy to me, but just like Gigi I’m still hesitant on giving up my inner hopeless romantic.

Why do we do freaking do this? Why do we pump our friends into a rabid frenzy about all things related to the opposite sex? Why do we feel the need to dissect everything? Why can’t things just be, and that’s it. I doubt this changes with age because my friends run the gamut: early 20s thru 50s and we all participate.Doesn't change with relationship status either - there's married folk, divorced folk, single, single and mingling, engaged, committed, just dating, the whole gamut. Even the guy pals are in on it, straight and gay.

As they say in the movie - Are we the exception or the rule?

immature giggle..

2009-01-20T13:39:00.001-05:00

Sorry, I saw this ad and started cracking up. It reminds me of the time we received promotional condom can koozies and hats from Trojan when I was working in the Kent Stater office. Unsupressable childish giggles. :-)

Reflections on my youth, part 1.

2009-01-12T20:01:00.002-05:00

Current mood: nostalgic
Category: Life

A conversation on Friday has sparked a whole steaming heap of fresh blog post ideas, so you're all in big trouble now.

For this one, I've busted out good old "dear diary" and some of it's friends as reference. For a visual on Dear Diary, picture a sad little lockable mint green diary with a unicorn on the cover, so full of ticket stubs and little white strips of paper fortune cookie fortunes that the binding is streched to the hilt and the lock will never again function. It looks more like a fanned out paper doorstop than a journal, and it's only four inches high. Every entry was started in the usual fasion "Dear Diary..." It was the first (and probably the tackiest) of many notebooks that have littered my life and been filled with my thoughts, hopes, dreams and desires since I was about 10 years old. If you truly wanted to see the progression of a person from child to woman, the box of these little treasures would be the perfect place to start your study.

I sadly haven't always posessed the same eloquent way with words. My first cursive missives are barely legibile and it pains me to read some of the subject matter that was important to me back then.

Let's take a look at who I was as a reflection after reading some of this fine literary fodder.

I was never a girlie girl. I was tom boy who liked to play rough, get dirty and never wore pink willingly. Because of this, I was a bit of a late bloomer when it came to seeing boys as anything more interesting than sparring partners in imaginary battles with space aliens and ninjas. My best friend since kindergarten is a boy. I believe we met because he made me eat sand during inside recess one day. We grew up with only 6 houses in between us. We used to ride our bikes everywhere. I had this awful pink bike with a flowered basket strapped to the front and he always had some cool boy BMX bike thing. In the summers, he'd deliver newspapers and I'd always tag along as company. When we stopped at the local bar, the New Milford Cafe they'd give us PayDay candy bars as a tip and after we were done delivering, we'd go a quarter mile down the road to a little mom and pop gas station called Girton's and load my basket up with Orange Crush in glass bottles, nacho cheese Doritos and stacks of Garbage Pail Kids. I'm sure when they autopsy my body when I die, that most of my innards will be dyed an unnatural shade of orange thanks to this.

He taught me how to play chess and a variety of card games, cheat at Trivial Pursuit, and we used to have marathon phone "conversations" that were mostly him, giving me the play by play on a video game he was beating as I listened and laughed.

I still remember one moment around 4th grade. I was one of the first people in my class to get boobs. Most girl's would be ecstatic. To say i was pissed was an understatement. During one extra rambunctious wrestling match in the middle of my livingroom, he accidentally pinned of of the girls under his elbow and I squealed like a stuck pig. When he asked what was wrong and I told him, he told me to send them back and proceeded to try and kick them back into my chest. (Funny, I think I am the first girl to ever have a guy tell her to send her boobs back LoL) This was the first time I think we truly acknowledged we were different in that way and there was no hiding it.

Even though we don't talk as much nowadays as we did back then, he's one of the people who know me best and probably always will. Eventually kids are cruel to a twosome like ours. They assume you can't just be friends and spend that much time together and not have any hanky panky going on. Because of this, we had a huge blowout and didn't speak for almosty all of our 3-year long middle school career. No offense to him, but kissing him would've been like kissing a toad... Not because he's not a good looking guy, just because he's him, he's like the brother I never had. Yuck! As I once told his mom in the grocery store "I will always love him, just not 'that' way." LoL God, I was melodromatic even as a kid!

Since much of the first installment of the Herbie Diary collection includes info on stupid fights we had and goofy things we did, I thought it best to start with a story about the two of us. This is only one of many....Let's hope he doesn't kill me for it. He's not on blogs, but his sister is. Maybe I can talk her into not telling him. Afterall, she was willing to trade him for a goldfish sometimes just as much as I was. Guess it's good we never found a buyer and there was no eBay back then. ;-)

More to come soon. I'm on a roll...

trying this out...

2009-01-12T20:01:00.001-05:00

Current mood: cold
Category: Life

Haven't tried to use the iPhone to post a blog yet, but thought I'd give it a try.

I'm glad it finally stopped snowing. I was beginning to think they'd never plow my road. Living right on the edge of town certainly makes you feel like the forgotten child road-service wise. Stupid snowblower is still evil. Tried getting it to start with no luck, so I gave up and shoveled the drive and sidewalk. I think my arm was sore more from yanking that damn cord than the actual shoveling.

Glad I didn't park in the garage cause the drift in front of it was nasty! It would gave taken quite a lot longer to clean up than the hour It already took. Blah!

The weather also made me wish I had the stack up for the fireplace. Was perfect fireside cuddling weather. Even if I'd only have been cuddling the cats, it still would've been nice. LOL

As much as I'm not a huge fan of the snow, part of me really wants to go sled riding and build a goofy snowman. Figures, perfect powder for skiing and crap for packing on this one. Oh well. I would probably freeze my ass off anyways. This whole older you get, the faster you get cold thing is sucks. I still don't like big puffy winter jackets, but I'd be a Herbcicle without my trusty leather or pea coat. (did i mention my love of scarves? Good thing i knit) And yes, I still occasionally wear flip flops, just not as often. LOL

Hope everyone was safe and warm this weekend.

Tradition...

2009-01-08T21:44:00.002-05:00

Current mood: talkative
Category: Life

Was cleaning photos off the iPhone and almost forgot to share. This is the traditional Herb family New Year's Day meal: homemade sauerkraut (we shred the cabbage and ferment it and can it all by ourselves), pork and mashed potatoes. Stinky, but yum!

Oh, and this movie looks like a fun girls nite out in the making! http://www.mybestfriendsgirlmovie.com/ Love the line, "What are you, a mini-wheat?" LoL Yay for the occasional guilty-pleasure chick flick!

Before I’m 30...

2009-01-08T21:43:00.001-05:00

Current mood: vibrant
Category: Goals, Plans, Hopes

I am a list maker. I make lists when I pack for a trip, lists of what I need to do at work, shopping lists, lists of career goal stuff, lists of letters I need to write and places I need to see. You name it, I would probably make a list for it.

I once had a friend who had lists of things they wanted to do before they would hit each decade mark in their life. I thought this was a great idea, so I've kidnapped it. I kinda veered away from my "life list-making" in my early 20s. Guess I just thought it seemed a bit fuddy-duddy. But about two years ago I decided 30 was on the horizon and I needed to get cracking on a list, no matter how short.

I won't lie. This list has changed a little bit. A few things were added and a few removed, but I am in general happy with the result. It's not long because I procrastinated, but I've already started the list of things to do before 40! LoL I do wish I had started sooner and given it more thought though...

Here's what I decided to accomplish before Feb. 24 of this year:

1. Buy a house - Done....This was always on my list of things to do in my head, and I did it before I even wrote the official list. Sadly, now all I wanna do is sell the house and find a new one. LoL Go figure.
2. Learn to twirl fire poi - Done.... I may not be great at it, but I haven't set myself on fire yet! (knock on wood)
3. Breathe fire - In progress....I have been practicing the spitting of the water, the flammable liquid and have made the wick stick. I've consulted with flair bartenders on safety issues and taken an online training course, but I still have yet to do this. I need a calm day with absolutely no breeze, a few friends with safety equipment and I have to get up my nerve. I'm kinda partial to my face, hair, eyebrows and the lining of my lungs. I will do this soon, but only once! I admit, I am afraid I'll get all excited when I actually do it and suck back air, which is a big no-no.
4. Learn a new craft - Done.... I started fiddling with polymer clay when I first made the list and I've gotten pretty good at make useless crap with it.
5. Get a tattoo - In progress....My grandmother remembered me saying that I wanted to do this and has gifted me with one for Christmas. I'll be going to get it this month! (Did I mention I hate needles?) When it's all done I'll take a pic and post it, otherwise you'll never see it as it'll be well hidden and corporate-appropriate.
6. Support a new charity every month for a year - Done.... Last year I picked a different organization each month and did something for them. Donated money, time, supplies, attended events)
7. Kiss someone new - Done.... please don't judge me too much. This was a late addition. Admittedly after being with the same person for 6 years, and getting cheated on in spectacular, Jerry-Springeresque fashion, I decided I needed to take action and do something and after all that this seemed about as rebellious as I was ready to go for the moment. I think it just reminded me there are other fish in the sea and hello? kissing is fun! Kinda cheesy and lame, but whatever. Did I mention kissing is fun? (see past post with mention of how I spent my 29th birthday and you'll know how I scratched this one off the list LoL) I think it should be a rule you get kisses on every birthday! LoL I woulda left this off the list and not told you, but I am trying to be full-disclosure so that wouldn't be quite fair.
8. Find and buy knee-high leather boots - Done... I love, love, love knee high boots. I think they are super duper hot and I've always wanted a pair. But, since I am blessed with giant calves and they tend to be kind of expensive, I thought I'd never get a pair. I actually bought two pair - one in brown and one in black. And they were on sale. Go me!
9. Learn to play guitar - Postponed.... I decided to hold this one off till the 40th list as I was lazy and didn't do much of anything towards accomplishing it, other than having Dan re-string and tune my guitar for me. It's just a crappy little acoustic, but it's my crappy little acoustic! (Thanks, Dan!)
10. Figure out who my dad was - Doubtful to ever happen......This will probably never get crossed off my list, but I'm stubborn. I'm putting it on every list till I die. It was what I asked for on my 18th birthday, as a graduation gift from college and as a wedding present if I ever get married. Maybe at some point my mother will give in and give me his last name. I doubt it though. Sigh.... I'll tell this story another day. Just not in the mood to elaborate right now.

After my birthday, I'll post the list for 40. It'll be kinda fun giving online play-by-plays on the status I think. Till then, I'm still tweaking.

Anyone else make lists? Humor me - let me know 3 things you want to accomplish before you hit your next decade mark! Yes, this means ALL of you! No fair reading and not sharing. :-P

I didn’t grow up there, but I went to school there.

2009-01-08T21:39:00.002-05:00

Current mood: nostalgic

I saw this list and it made me chuckle, so I had to share. My edits are in bold. Fun times in Kent, fun times...

You know you are from Kent, OH when...

- seeing a black squirrel is an everyday occurence (and they eat chicken wings from the garbage. I am almost ashamed to admit it, and disturbed that they are still online, but read more on this from one of my Opinion columns from the Kent Stater. yes, they actually allowed me to write and it was published. I even was nominated for a Hearst Journalism Award! Not for this story though. I was more fluff than substance, trust me. LoL )

- there is nothing to do downtown unless you're at least 18

- there are more tatoo/piercing parlors and bars downtown than actual shops

- you will never go more than a month into the summer without seeing 3/4 of your school's population because the entire town goes to Kent Fest.

- you won't drink water from the tap outside of the city limits because you know Kent has the best water on the planet (I don't agree with this. I am a well water girl. City water makes me gag. This is why I have a fridge with a water filter/dispenser)

-someone asks you where the rec center is and you direct them to the one on Franklin Ave. because what they're really thinking of (on the KSU campus) is more commonly known as the wellness center

- you mourned the loss of the Loft

- you have visited 'the tower' (he he he......)

- you know where half of your teachers live

- ravens are for burning (Or kangaroos)

- you're on a first-name basis with your high school principal

- you are praying for the day that Steak n Shake is actually in Kent (not really)

-Brimtucky is a real place (This is true of Rootstown folk as well)

-You are offended if someone says you're from Ravenna (So wrong, but so true!)

-You skipped a class to go to Swenson's

-FU Bob is a family friend (Actually, I insulted him in the newspaper, too. I'm not proud of that one so I am not linking to it. A careful googler could find it though. I was a freshman, what did you expect?)

-by "the beach", you mean a tiny man made patch of sand on Twin Lakes

-You know the Kent State campus better than most of the college students (I was a college student. Hello?)

-popcorn coming in 32 flavors is normal

-Katie's Korner does not involve prostitution, only ice cream (That's some serious yumminess)

-Guido's does not just deal pizza... (I only know of pizza, chicken and jo jo's. Did I miss something??)

-You have attended either a Sweetheart, Farsight, Annabel, or Starcrossed show.

-You remember when Starbucks used to be Brady's Cafe (I prefered Brady's. Cheap breakfast, open after I got off my 3rd shift job at Kinko's across the street and they didn't care if you loitered for hours gabbing)

-You can quote graffitti under the bridge at River Front Park

-you can't walk from one side of Kent's campus to the other without knowing somebody, be it a student, a teacher, a staff worker, or some random "townie". (I can't enter portage County without running into someone I know!)

-you go downtown on Sunday nights for the anti-war protest...and everyone there looks ripped straight out of 1969.

-it can be 70 degrees and sunny one day, then 30 and snowing the next and you don't think anything of it

-you know what "Moon Glo" is and no it's nothing like "Moon Shine"

-you know who "Stow Hoes" are and where "Silver Ghettos" is

-90% of your senior class went to Kent State

-you show your friends from out of town it usually ends with them saying "that was it?"

-If your own parent(s) don't work at KSU, you know at least 5 people whose parents do.

-you drive by that building on 43 and wonder what buisness will fail there next, joining the likes of Hills, Ames, and Tops. (LMAO You forgot Gold Circle and I think Big Wheel and Woolworth's, too. That building is cursed, I swear.)

-you take 15 minutes to go down Main Street because you hit EVERY RED LIGHT.

-You actually believe Silver Meadows is a ghetto.

-People on Campus think it was cool that you went to school in Kent all your life, and you think the exact opposite.

-when people say they don't know where Kent is when you tell them where you are from you reply "the city where Kent State is" and are annoyed when they then understand...you are even more annoyed when they ask you one of two questions "The place where the shootings happened in the 70's?" or "why didnt you go to Kent State?" - if you go to school out of town... (Ok, I went to school in Germany and even THEY know it as the school where there were shootings.)

-when you've almost run over Wheelchair George (always rockin the cowboy boots) while crossing the Main Street Bridge despite his rotating "handicapped" sign sticking out of his ride.

-You remember Mrs. B from the Kent Free Library.

-you remember when the Taco Bell drive thru had a PHONE!! (So gross... If only we'd had Purell back then!)

-the line at Chipotle is significantly shorter during Christmas vacation and summer (because the KSU students have gone home

-expressing yourself on large rocks is perfectly normal (I painted the rock twice in my college career. Did you get to paint a rock? Didn't think so!)

Your help needed: I am DESPERATE for a song....

2009-01-06T21:38:00.000-05:00

Current mood: frustrated

I love music. For most of my life I had this notion that someday what I would be when I grew up would somehow involve it. Sadly, this is not the case. To make up for this, I listen to music like it is my crack. Sweet, sweet audio crack. I will give almost anything a listen at least once. My tastes are eclectic enough to freak out anyone who's borrowed my iPod and placed it on shuffle. Not many people mix redneck country, Christian contemporary, classical, jazz, pop, 70s/80s/90s and today, a little rap and hardcore rock in one place.

Because I get tunes stuck in my head, I get cranky when I hear something on a TV show, fall in love with it and then cannot find out what it is or who sings it. The internet has helped a lot with this and my iPhone has the Shazam song recognition app (Which rocks my socks off and makes me extremely giddy) But I have now found one that stumps them both and it's driving me crazy! Alas, my technology has let me down...

So, I am placing a bounty on a specific MP3. I am in dire need of a song that's been stuck in my head since I watched a recent episode of Skins on BBC. (Series 2, episode 9 - end of show where Cassie is crying and runs through NY - fabulous show if you haven't seen it yet. Typical edgy Brit humor and content) From what I've found online looks like the name of the song is "My Town, My City" but I still have no clue who wrote or performs it. Just know it's stuck in my head and I want to find it!

It is not Adele's "Hometown" as is incorrectly noted online. That was the song used when the show originally aired on BBC. The BBC America DVD version uses this new mystery song.

I am willing to award the finder of this song an edible reward. Dinner out as thanks! Help!?!?!?!?

I found a clip of it on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6tgu5rRvHDg (the images have nothing to do with it, it's not Amy or Evanescence)

LYRICS:

Turning my memories
Hoping to find out
where all the loyalty's gone
The friends that I had then
Turned into strangers
Thinking of you all alone
If you see me know
You won't see me alone
If you see me
I'll be heading home
Cos this is my town
This is my city
Through my eyes it looks so pretty
This is my town, this is my city now
These are my people, this is my song
Dirty streets where I belong
This is my town, this is my city now
This is my city now
This is my city
Through my eyes it looks so pretty
This is my town ,this is my city now
These are my people , this is my song
Dirty streets where I belong
This is my town, this is my city now
This is my city now
My City

Since I have over 2,000 views....

2009-01-06T21:36:00.000-05:00

Current mood: thoughtful
Category: Quiz/Survey

I need to get back into the habit of blogging. It makes me a better writer and I think it's my own little version of therapy. LoL And I kinda like the attention! (2002 views and counting, oh yeah!) I'm starting 2009 off slow with one of those cheesy surveys. Then on to some of the items discussed in my previous blog. :-)

Come on people, I loooove comments! Let me know how you rang in the New Year after you read this!

2008 IS OVER, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?

Lost a friend?
Not because they died, but yes.

Stayed single almost the whole year?
Umm.... kinda? Does dating count as not single? It's kinda 50/50 I guess.

Kissed someone new?
Yes someone brand new and someone from the past that's new to this decade. (as far back in my kissing past as I can go, actually) LoL

Had your heart broken?
Not this year!

Had a stalker?
I had an ex leave love notes at my house, send roses to my work (Which I refused delivery of - I am such a beotch!) and various other creepy and unwanted things... It sure felt uncomfortable for a while, but hardly stalker-ish. Glad it's over though.

Done something you've regretted?
Maybe

Were involved in something you'll never forget?
I think and hope so.

Visited a different country?
No. (need to change that)

Lost something/someone important to you?
Does my mind count?

Got a gift you adore?
Yep! (it's my faithful companion, the iPhone! I can admit to being swayed by shiny gadgets)

Dyed your hair?
Hell, I've done that every year since 8th grade.

Did you break up with anyone?
Kinda, if you consider what we did dating.

Did you get anything for Valentine's day?
No.

Did you meet anyone special?
Re-met them, actually. There are a few of these cool kinda people back in my life! Facebook and MySpace ROCK!

Did you meet any new friends this year?
Yes, some very cool people I kinda knew and just had never talked to much before and a few brand-new people.

Did you dislike anyone?
I can't lie, I'm only human. Hell yes. And if thoughts could kill, they'd be pushing daisies.

Did you make any new enemies?
I like to think I'm not the kind of person who incites hate or anger in people. Hello? Have you met me? ;-)

Did you resolve any fights?
Maybe...?

Who are your closest friends?
My mom (don't laugh, she is!), JDub, Tater Tot, my bowling girls, Daniel

Did you grow apart from anyone?
Yeah, but we can grow back again, too.

Do you have any regrets when it comes to your friendships?
I wish we had more time together. We all need time management classes (and internet connections! LoL)

How was your birthday?
Crazy. I think they whole turning 29 thing freaked me out more than I wanted to admit, so I went a little crazy with the shots, the dorky behavior and the sucking face with inappropriate boys. Not my proudest moment, but it was fun at the time. I guess I was making up for the fact that my 21st was so calm.

Did you have a cake?
I had delicious cupcakes made by Tater Tot.

Did you have a party?
A bunch of crazy people crashed my cousin's house for a night of debauchery, glow sticks, Polaroid pics, drunken board games and movies. (And anatomically correct play dough sculptures, if my mind serves me correctly) I think I need to burn some of the Polaroids as part of the 30th festivities. LoL

Did you get any presents?
Yep. :-)

Did you change at all this year?
I think I finally got some of the wildness outta my system that I'd been bottling up. I also learned a lot about myself and think I grew up a bit. I've always considered myself mature, but I think I needed to act like an ass for a bit to remind myself that normal me is pretty damn fun and ok. I don't need to try so hard. being a nerd who's happy with herself is a-ok.

Did you get your hair cut?
My usual layers

Did you change your style?
trying to dress more my age.

Were you in school?
No classes this year.

Did you go on any vacations?
Nope. Stayed at home and was a bum on my day's off. LoL

Would you change anything about yourself now?
I might get rid of a few of the scars of the past if I could. I still have a bit of growing and changing and becoming more self-confident and patient to work on. And maybe I need to worry a little less and live a little more. (but in more sensible ways LoL)

Was 2008 a good year?
Not too bad...

Do you think 2009 will top 2008?
Sure, no reason not to be optimistic!

procrastination...

2008-12-05T21:35:00.000-05:00

Current mood: indifferent
Category: Writing and Poetry

I have no less than 14 half-completed blog posts/ideas just laying around in my writing drafts. Each time I open one, I add a little more or to it or do the "eh, maybe later" shrug.

I need motivation. I need a voice of reason. I need an editor.

So.... I am giving you, the READER, the power. In the comments below pick a number from 1 to 14 and those will be the posts I finish and put up here next. I'll complete them in the order your comments come in, so don't delay!

As a teaser on what you might pick, the pile of possibilities includes (in no specific order):

• info on my to-do before 30 list
• rants about MySpace ads
• upcoming goals
• my goofy obsessions
• thoughts on provocative quotes and poems
• a stupid survey
• Herbie dating stories
• a general flashback
• holiday wishes

Choose wisely.... or be bored outta your gourd!

Ho Ho Holidays....

2008-11-21T02:09:00.000-05:00

Current mood: animated
Category: Life

Ok. Let me start off by saying I am not a Scrooge.

Christmas is not my 1 holiday, but that's probably because the real meaning behind it has been lost in the shuffle of consumerism (that I participate in along with everyone else, and which fuels my paycheck, so I cannot bitch too loudly)

It also because we went through a bit of a Christmas drought after my grandfather died. There were no trees or decorations and there was much temporary bah humbugness (for like 10 years....)

But, I do enjoy the holiday. I love getting things for my family and friends. (there's a thrill in the hunt for something that perfectly fits their personality or needs), I like helping others and enjoy the volunteer stuff I can do, I like pulling out the ornaments and decor that has memories associates with it. (The ornaments made as a kid, the grandfather nativity) I love baking, looking at *tasteful* light displays, drinking cocoa, singing carols and just general jolliness....

But the whole decorate and start shoving stuff down my throat before Thanksgiving is a bit much for me. And gaudy, over the top, blinking nightmares make me twitch.

There are a few people in my neighborhood that get wayyy too into the "crap in my yard" festivities.

One person has so much mismatched stuff it looks like the yard sale where Christmas decorations go to die. Old school giant plastic candles and candy canes are mixed in with giant blow-up bohemouth snowmen, carousel snowglobes, reindeer, toy soldiers and Grinch's. Santa is crawling up the side of the house on an animated light ladder with an elf and a pile of presents, while he's also on the ground driving the sleigh, which is pulled by like 10 tiny, awful, blinking reindeer. And there's a light-up train. And the whole thing is surrounded by technicolor draped shrubbery and corkscrew Christmas trees in unnatural colors.

And this week, one guy put so many blinking, chasing, strobbing lights in his front yard it looks like a landing strip for jet arliners. Most of them are blue, and none of the coordinate with the blinking. GAH!!! Here, let me add a technicolor pile of fresh barf to the front yard to accent the entire fiasco. Can we at least work on a theme, other than "burn out my neighbor's retinas?"

I have to admit, I am glad the one neighbor right next door to me got foreclosed on and moved as I may have popped my lid and gone nutty fruitcake on them this year. At the after Christmas sale last year they bought one of those blow up carousel snowglobes.... but theirs was the "deluxe" version. It also played music. Loudly. On repeat. Same damn carol over, and over, and over. I seriously wanted to turn that thing into an oversized punching back. her husband got wise after a few glaring looks when I came home and took the stupid things own after a few days. "holidays are over honey...." Do we see the irony in the fact that they could not pay their rent/mortgage and lost their home, they complained in front of their kids that there was no money for presents that year, but they had money to blow on an expensive piece of plastic crap? yes, it was on sale, but it still had to cost quite a bit. Hope that snowglobe doubles as a comfy tent for 5, plus 3 dogs. I try not to judge, but sometimes people make it VERY difficult. (did I mention they also beat their dogs.... and verbally abused their kids? And I'm not even bringing up the damn treehouse they built with windows that overlooked my privacy fence, providing HOURS of entertainment for me as I tried to relax in the pool in my backyard, or grill out or do yardwork in peace. Oh, damn. I did bring it up.... Oh yes... they were lovely.)

~deep breath. end rant.~

I already started Christmas shopping and next weekend I'll bust out some decorations and baking stuff. Till then, I'll just chill in my little "fall/thanksgiving" world. :-)

To prove I am not scroogie, what is the one thing you are most looking forward to this holiday season (Turkey day through New Year's)? Comment below!

Happy German Girl!

2008-11-18T00:58:00.000-05:00

Current mood: Glücklich (Happy)
Category: Glücklich (Happy) Life

Mom and I found the best German import store while wandering around near the Westside Market this weekend. It's called Hansa Import Haus (2717 Lorain Ave. Cleveland, OH 44113) They have a whole pile of my fave items: Duplo chocolate bars, Kinder Eggs, various Maggi and Knorr cooking items, baking items, killer beer, and magazines!!! I even got to practice a bit of my language skills.

I'm extra excited because this means I can finally make some of the baking recipes I've been hoping to try. (German baking soda, vanilla sugar etc, are a bit different that US ingredients, so they can drastically change the taste and results)

I'll post pics from my snazzy new phone tomorrow to show off my finds...the phone is the other exciting weekend news. My inner techie geek is VERY happy!

So, even though the weekend sucked because I spent a large chunk of it in my work cube cranking out a Web site, I founds some very happy highlights. :-) (yes, the Website is finally live and kicking, too. If you know the URL pop on and check it out. I'm rather proud of what JW and I did. If you don't know the URL, ask and I'll e-mail it. Not posting it here, sorry.)

Now, if you'll excuse me. I'm going home to read about the German opinion on our recent election choices (Spiegel magazine), while drinking a Warsteiner Orange (never had one before) and nibbling a cheese brotchen.... Ja, ja, ja!

Use your power, go vote!

2008-11-03T18:19:00.002-05:00

I was taught from an early age that voting is important. If you don't vote tomorrow, you technically have no right to complain about anything the new administration does for the next 4 years or complain if your taxes go up because of a levy or you lose your job because a law changes. Why? Because you chose to not have a voice when you had a chance to be heard and counted. There is a reason people have died for this right. It's powerful!

Yes, the lines will be long. Yes, you will be surrounded by people with opinions different from your own. Yes, sometimes picking who and what to vote for isn't easy.

I have avoided talking about who I am voting for because as much as I'd love to share my political views with you, I think it's far more important for you to do a little research and make up your mind on your own. Only you know what is right for you and what you feel is best for our country. The people you are voting for make our laws, and act as the voice and face of our country to the entire world. The choice we make impacts everyone, even those outside of our borders. Trust me. As a person who lived outside of this country for a year, who our President is matters BIG TIME on how people in other nations view us. You would be amazed at what you see about politics and America on the news in Europe. Even though I have my degree in journalism, I am 100% certain that our "free press" isn't as free and open as we'd like to think it. We tend to live a very sheltered and selfish American-driven life.

If you're torn and need some help understanding the candidates and issues, visit the special voter's guide on Cleveland.com that lets you view your local ballot by entering your address (http://www.cleveland.com/voterguide/)

This video is a little outdated, because it asks you to register to vote. But, the points it makes are still valid. (and if you can't trust me, who better to trust than a crapload of famous people!?!) ;-)

I don’t think I will ever grow out of...

2008-10-28T19:16:00.003-04:00

...wanting to buy pointless crap from the quarter (now $0.50) machines at grocery stores and restaurants. There's something that sucks me into some of those little trinkets and makes me smile like a dork.

I am especially fond of the fake tatoos, stickers, glowing things and goofy jewelry. (and if they still had slime machines, I would certainly buy some of the goo and freak people out with it for fun)

I remember getting all excited about which machine to pick as a kid. J and I went out to lunch with a friend and her daughters a few weeks ago and it was so much fun watching them open the little plastic egg enclosed treasures.

Lord help me if I ever have kids. They are going to be little junk machine junkies like me!
I think I'll start a new blog feature, the Junk Machine treasure hunt. I can post pics of what I find and if anyone else finds anything good, they better share, too!

Hey, it's better thank smoking or boozing it up as a dorky pasttime! ;-)

Reveille, Brut cologne and overalls...

2008-10-28T19:13:00.002-04:00

Today I miss the person who was the most important man in my life to date, my grandfather. Not that I don't miss him everyday, but for some reason I have really been thinking about him lately.

I basically grew up with 3 parents: my mom, my grandpa and my grandma. Mom and I lived next door to my grandparents. In the years before I started school and after my grandpa retired from Firestone, I was with him all day while my mom was at work. After I was in school, I spent the summers with him. We'd do yard work, he'd putz around his little workshop in the basement, tinkering with crafty and technical projects, and we ran around and did errands.

When I was in 8th grade something happened to him (still not 100% clear on what or why, but it involved electrolytes that were low and some very bad decisions by a doctor) and grandma had to call the squad to come and get him. When we got the ER, I remember them telling us they had to resuscitate and intebate him and mom and gma getting furious because he had a DNR. I remember them telling us he might not make it. I remember going into the bathroom and kicking and punching the stall door so hard it dented in the middle and a nurse came in and yelled at me. I remember after that he couldn't breath on his own and couldn't talk. I remember he wrote us notes in a notebook. His mind was all there, but his body wasn't cooperating. I remember taking him home and knowing that it was only because he didn't want to die in the hospital. I remember the day he stopped breathing. I was sitting at the kitchen table (his bed was set up in the living room) and I couldn't understand why no one was helping him, why my mom and gma who were nurses didn't stop it, why I wasn't allowed out of the kitchen....

I hate that as I get older, my memory of all the things about him starts to grow fuzzy. But there are some things I will always remember.

He would wake me up with Reveille. My grandfather served in the Army in WW2 and he had the most beautiful silver trumpet. And every now and then I would get an Army wake up call blasted in my room.
He loved to sing and whistle. On the days he didn't wake me up with Reveille, I would sometimes get serenaded by opera music. He'd throw a record on the player and sing along in a beautiful Tenor voice. I think it's all his fault that I appreciate classical music, love to sing (even opera - it was my dream as a kid to sing with Pavarotti and I'd sing along whenever he was on PBS) and find foreign languages fascinating.
Whisker face. He called his facial hair his whiskers. On days when he'd get scruffy, if he was hugging me, he'd rub his chin or cheek on my forehead or cheek because he knew it grossed me out as a kid that it felt like sandpaper. After he'd shave, he always smelled like Brut cologne/aftershave. I remember running up to feel his cheek when I'd smell that. I admit, I still have his old bottle of Brut in my mementos box and the smell still reminds me of him.
Boxers and under shirts. My grandfather was most certainly king of his castle. When he was done working he'd lounge around in boxers, a white men's undershirt, knee-high white socks and slippers. he would read his newspaper and if anyone came to visit, he'd flip the edge down and say hello and if they didn't like his outfit they could leave. It was so funny.
The baby blue pick up. The car I remember most that he had was a little baby-blue Ford pick-up. It had a cap over the bed and he had a seat bolted in there that my cousin and I sometimes took turns riding in.
Overalls. Whenever he worked outside he'd wear these dark denim overalls and flannel shirts.
Her treated my grandma like she was the only woman in the world and loved her completely.
He made the best scrambled eggs and he'd always buy the big Texas glazed donuts and cut them up to share.
He bet me that if I made it through my 6th grade year with perfect attendance he'd give me a $100 bill. I won the bet.
My grandma had a Nativity set that we all loved to play with at Christmas. He made handmade copies of it's barn for his daughters and grandkids. 2 years ago I found the perfect match to my grandmas Jesus, Mary and Joseph for mine. (and one sheep LoL)
He loved birds, domestic and wild. he always had cockatiels and he'd teach them to ride around on his shoulder in the house, and they'd steal crumbs off his lips and chin when he ate toast.
He let my cousin and I dress him up with doll clothes and silly things. (I have a pic, I'll have to scan and post it)
He was the president of our county's Democrat Party for a while. I remember going to the meetings with him and still run into some of the politicians I met back then off and on. It started my interest in how politics work...
He built all the rock walls on my family's property by had with no help. They are beautiful sandstone walls and they don't use any concrete.
He bought me my first bike and taught me how to ride.
We always went on the best road trips with him to different places all over the state.
He loved camping.
He loved model trains and always dreamed of setting up a hardcore display of them in the basement to tinker with. He sadly never got to do that.
He'd always sneak over to our house for coffee on the mornings he'd accidentally wake my grandma up too early and get in trouble. (She was not big on getting woke up early on her days off and he was always an early bird.)
He told the best stories and had the best laugh.
I wish I had know back then how short our time together was going to be. I wish I had asked more questions and paid more attention. I still wish he was here.

I hope that he'd be proud of who I've become and I look forward to seeing him again someday so I can share with him all the stories he's missed out on.

I wish you all could have met him. I think you'dve loved him just as much as I did. Guess I just wanted to share a little about him with you. Thanks for reading.

Mullet alert!

2008-10-08T20:03:00.000-04:00

Bathroom confidential...

2008-10-08T10:22:00.003-04:00

Can I just say it's cruel and unusual punishment to close the bathroom without warning when a person has been faithfully drinking her 8 glasses a day of H2O? Can I add that I am usually so busy I wait till I'm at the "OMG I have to Pee!!!!" stage before I wander from my desk to go? And then you send me all the way across the building to the creepy, dark and scary bathroom that no one wants to use, and those that use it are usually given dirty looks because of it's proximity to people's cubes. And fifty bazillion people stop me to chit chat along the way as my bladder threatens to jump out of my body and bounce it's merry way to the bathroom unaccompanied. If you talked to me this afternoon and I was making funny faces, now you know why! (I wasn't just gonna say "sorry, gotta run and pee!" Somehow that oversteps to the coworker sharing level.)

On that note, can I also add a little "Hello" to the work bomb droppers. Go somewhere else or at least courtesy flush! Screw water preservation in the circumstance - preserve my damn nose and sanity! Seriously. Eat some fiber or something. And buy those infomercial toilet drops that block the stench of death. I really don't need to walk through a looming cloud of the fragrance of what you digested 3 weeks ago. It's like hitting a death wall. GAG! No, really. I've gagged and just left the restroom without my own potty break because of this on several occasions.

Nasty, nasty, nasty.... Not like work bathrooms aren't nasty enough sometimes. You'd be surprised what a bunch of grown women will do in a lavatory that's not in their own home. Can we please try to be a little more lady-like and less like animals in the forest? At least some of the animals scratch up some dead leaves and dirt to cover it up. Eesh....

And to all you Joe 6 packs out there....

2008-10-06T18:51:00.001-04:00

The last part cracks me up because I told someone this weekend that I finally found motivation for them to watch the debates, if only there were one more VP version. Maverick? CHUG! LoL Sorry - she is like a human cartoon character. How can you not love the SNL mockery, no matter which way you lean politically?

http://www.nbc.com/Saturday_Night_Live/video/clips/vp-debate-open-palin-biden/727421/

Playing with balls...

2008-09-25T19:13:00.001-04:00

...get your mind out of the gutter.

No, really! The gutter is a bad place to be when it comes to this post. (And you shouldn't be a pervy-pervington. Shame on you!)

Last night kicked off the 08/09 bowling league season. It's a work league and I love it because of the people I get to hang out with. There have been nights when I've laughed so hard I cried. I'm all about the socializing...

The team I'm on is in it for pure fun. We're not super competitive, which is a very good thing considering that up till when I joined the league I had bowled maybe 2 times in my life TOTAL. I will even confess that I've had the lowest average on the league for the last 2 years. Even lower than the cute little 84 year old lady who bowls with a 4 lb. ball... But all that is changing folks! Last night we set starting averages for the year and I had one wild night. I'm sitting at 117 to start. I'm excited, because my average has never been above 100, but also a little scared since I'm not sure I can keep up with this one.

But, enough on the bowling...

I've been avoiding talking about the weight loss situation the last 2 weeks because I've been crazy busy at work and kind of stressed. Lots of big projects are hitting at the same time, which means a lot of late nights and I'm feeling a little wacky. I've been eating ok, but sometimes I don't get to grab something till late or don't eat anything at all. I'm guessing my body is kinda pissed at me. I did pop in the gym a few times (thank goodness for their early/late hours), but I have been avoiding the trainer. Once I get a few of these work things completed, I might suck it up and go deal with him, but right now he'll probably just frustrate me.

I weigh in tomorrow for WW, so we'll see what happens...

American badass....

2008-09-23T21:17:00.001-04:00

I like to think of myself as a fairly tough chick. I try not to take too much crap from anyone and I'm not afraid to get a little dirty. But, even we ballsy women have a limit. I think a few of us found that out this weekend.

Went to a bonfire and Jenn and John's house Saturday night. While we were sitting around the fire in the dark, this creepy noise started coming from the woods. It seriously sounded like one of those plastic giggle/groan tubes being shaken and moving closer to us slowly, but there was no noise like footsteps or leaves crackling or sticks breaking. John said he'd heard it before, too. They busted out the mega-spotlight flashlight and looked and looked but never saw anything moving and the noise finally went away after two appearances. Wayyy creepy. Guess the verdict is we think it was either a baby deer, a coyote, or the spirits of the undead coming to eat out brains! LoL

Then, later on at like 2 in the morning there was a noise right along the edge of the trees that sounded like something growling! Let me say you have never seen two girls jump outta lawn chairs so fast! My cousin and I jumped up and hid behind everyone while John looked for the flashlight, since we were the closest to the sound. And what did we find once the light was shining brighly on our culprit this time.....?

A little kitten that was MAYBE 6 months old coughing up a hairball and mewling/groaning in a pitiful way.

Yeah, I don't see any bravery awards coming my way anytime soon. Anyone wanna take me to a haunted house this year and see what happens? LoL

Sample of a giggle/groan tube -

fashion advice from the fashionably unfashionable...

2008-09-14T13:59:00.000-04:00

This is an open letter to the women of the world,

I admit, I am no fashion maven. The only reason I know what Jimmy Choo and Manolo Blanic are is from watching Sex and the City. But don't ask me to identify them on the street - I would be clueless. I'm more a Lane Bryant/Wal-Mart/Fashion Bug kinda girl. But even I can spot some serious fashion "don't"s when out and about.

First, let's talk about a topic near and dear to everyone's hearts, literally and figuratively. Breasts.

I know men dig them, and those of us who have them like to flaunt them. But, the older and wiser you get, the more your boobs should be viewed as an acessory instead of the entire outfit. Let's be honest - unless I know you really well I should not have intimate knowedge of just how big and what color your areolas and nips are. Put that shit away. Leave something to the imagination, and for the love of God - give those puppies some support. Your 10 year older self will thank you when you don't have to dodge tucking your boobies accidentally into the waistband of your pants. To an extent the jiggle is hot to guys I'm sure, but when it looks like they're going to take flight, it's just disturbing.

But, enough about the "the girls." Let's move on to lower persuits, the waistline.

Your pants need to fit. In your real size. If they don't and you're just obsessed with a number and grab pants too small you get the phenomenon called muffin top. Basically this means you look like you have a tiny waist/butt (congrats) but your upper body is all fluffed out and you look like a walking human lollipop (oh, bummer). This is not at all cute. We all know where all that stuff actually belongs so you're not fooling anyone. Knock it off. It has to hurt - how do you breath?? And we don't wanna see your undies or your crack either. Please - do you want me to swipe my ATM card and see if you make change or attempt to flick a quarter in between your buttcheeks, cause you look like a piggy bank? Your mom called - she's not proud.

And one more area of discussion - your feet.

Stop buying shoes that don't fit! Gah! If you little piggies aren't actually sitting on shoe, the shoe doesn't fit! You look like a parrot on a perch with nasty claw toes. And just because they have an awesome pedicure, it doesn't make up for the fact that your toes are hanging out of your shoes. This is why they invented actual peep-toe shoes and sandals.

Again, I'm not saying I don't have a million things wrong with what I wear on a daily basis. I'm just venting on things that drive me nutty fruitcake.

Thanks for being my internet therapist,

~C

Got peach butt?

2008-09-12T22:29:00.000-04:00

I do! Courtesy of my lunch on Thursday, you get fruit mooned!

"Oh crap!"

2008-09-12T17:36:00.000-04:00

Surfing the channels last night and I came across what has to be the goofiest TV show I have ever seen. It was a train wreck and a half, so of course I couldn't tear my eyes away. (I waste many an hour of my life on stupid crap, what can I say) The show is Fox's "Hole in the Wall," and adaptation of a Japanese gameshow. I had 2 friends call/text me while I was starring at it to say "OMG - are you watching what I am watching?" A least I'm not alone is my loser-ness. LoL

Before I share my reponse to the show, let me help explain it to you. Remember those red puzzle ball's you (or a child you know) had as a baby - the ones where there were different shaped holes and little pieces you had to try and fit into the ball by shoving them through the correct holes? This is basically like that, but with people and the hole you have to fit in moves. Oh, and if you screw up, it knocks you into a pool of water.

And the people on the show - they have to wear the WORST outfits I have ever seen a human willingly wear. I'm sorry, but there is not enough prize money in the world to get me into one of those silver suits on national television - and I'm not exactly shy! They look like little human Chipotle burittos wrapped in foil, with every bump and curve on display for the world. Ummm. No.

Last night's show was apparently "try to see if fat people can fit through a tiny, tiny hole" night. Extra hell no. My boobs and butt simply would not work on this show - let alone the rest of me. GAH! They had on sumo wrestlers and some little chubby ladies called the Georgia Peaches. The one girl seriously cracked me up. I could feel her pain as she exclaimed "Oh Crap!" I would've said the same damn thing. My leg has not been that far behind my head since high school. Here's the snippet with her in it. I love the "Oh crap!" face. :-)

I could not stop laughing! I might check the show out again, just for the entertainment value, but I'm doing it strictly online so I can quickly skim for the good parts and skip the lames ones. You can check it out too, if you curious and want to waste some time - http://www.fox.com/fod/play.php?sh=holeinthewall.

I'm loving the comments (And shame on those of you who read my stuff and left none - this time it's your turn!) here's a question for you - would YOU go on this gameshow? Is there a gameshow you would LOVE to be on? Do tell, do tell!

2008-09-09T17:13:00.003-04:00

Saw an article for the new iPod Nano Apple just released. Apparently you can now make it switch songs by shaking it. So started the following chain of e-mails between me and my buddy J.

From: Chars

so will it change songs every 2 seconds if I go jogging with it? LoL

http://www.usatoday.com/tech/products/2008-09-09-ipod_N.htm?csp=Tech

From: J

As if you jog... lol

From: Chars

smart butt. Hmph You never know. Maybe I'll wake up one morning with this huge desire to jog around the block and then what? iPod catastrophe!

From: J

By the time you jog, they'll be out with another version... No need to worry yourself :P

Damn, I live a charmed life. LoL This conversation actually reminds me of one of favorite greeting cards. There's a funny comic fat lady on the front of the card dressed in sweats and it says - "I recently took up jogging." On the inside it says - "But I had to quit, it was bad for my health. My underwear kept catching on fire."

haha

So wrong, so wrong...

Oh how I love thee, let me count the ways!

2008-09-08T16:55:00.003-04:00

Dear beloved Google,

I am sending you this happy birthday message a few days late and I’m ashamed.

You and all of your beautiful apps and gadgets are the sunshine of my internet world. Your efficiency and usability set my heart a flutter and leave me mad with desire for more. How I long to stroke the queries and spiders of your search function, to be embraced in your comforting Gmail arms and taste just a drop of the sweetness that is YouTube, Blogger, Picasa, iGoogle and more….

Passion this strong cannot be quelled in a moment, but must be explored for a lifetime. I visit the swell of your electronic busom daily seeking the succor you deliver to my knowledge and social networking needs. The way you take possession of desirable internet companies ingnites a spark in me that I cannot explain with mere words and leaves me breathless.

Please do not hold my faux pas against me as losing you would crush my very being and leave me as a mere husk of a woman.

Thank you for all that you have provided in your first 10 years and all that you will be in my life now and for always.

Love, kisses and unmentionables,

Your biggest fan
~C

Just pondering out loud...

2008-08-27T17:47:00.001-04:00

Why, even when you think you are in total control of what you think and you feel does your mind and your heart still pop some suprises on you? Aren't you the master of your own destiny or something like that? Shouldn't a grown woman have some sort of an off button or something? Like a parachute as you hurtle toward the ground or a airbag in a front end crash or even one of those little beeping alarms that tell people they're too close when backing up? LoL

I feel like the girl in the book who asks for boobies from God (Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret, by Judy Blume) -

Are you there God? It's me, Chars. Can I please get a life safety feature or two installed? Maybe one of those fancy schmancy air pillow fluffy things that stunt people who jump out of windows land on? I'd be willing to pay extra for emotional airbags. And no, my boobs don't count. No matter how big they are. And maybe a roadmap so I can figure what the heck I'm doing would be nice. Or some detour signs? Or breadcrumbs? Thanks! That'd be peachy. Amen.

In all seriousness though, I've been doing a lot of thinking, honest praying and soul searching recently. Haven't found any answers yet, and not sure I will anytime soon. Just hoping for some mental clarity, calm and patience. Things all of us could use a little more of from time to time.

Last weekend was a lot of fun. I loved going to the fair and seeing so many people I'd hadn't seen in a long time. Being there just reminded me why Portage County is still home in my heart and where I probably need to be (at least closer to) long-term. I feel like I'm more me when I'm there and spending time with all the people there. It's a different vibe than Cleveland. (guess that's part of my soul searching, too)

My heart is heavy with things I wish I could talk about to you all, but they're too personal. I guess the people that need to know, already know what I'm talking about. For those that don't and care to, just say a little prayer for requests unspoken in the universe in general and I'm sure God will place a few of the ones I'm thinking about on that general list of billions and billions. LoL

Hope all is going well with you, dear friends and blog readers. Let's be thankful it's hump day and all look forward to Labor Day weekend!

Multimedia message

2008-08-22T23:54:00.000-04:00

Sometimes a fun night can be a ton of fun and still make you feel old. I am posting this from the 'Po county' fair. Ran into a lot of people from high school that i have not seen in years, and a ton of the kids (who are now teens or in college!) from the lake where i lifeguarded in the summers thru college. Gah i feel old!

Looking for a home: Mr. Harry Houdini

2008-08-21T11:09:00.005-04:00

This cute little guy was the runt of the family. He was bottle fed and raised by hand. He has all his shots and a clean bill of health, is box trained and almost 4 months old. He's still very small, but has a voracious appetite. Sometimes he eats so fast and fervently that he gets food stuck up his nose! Very lovable and playful, with a motorboat purrbox. He's a tough guy though. Not at all afraid of the adult cats in our home. He'll play with any of them and loves it! Know anyone looking for a cute little addition to their family? Let them know about Harry! He seriously needs a family of his own to love!

Harry protects his chipmunk ferociously LoL

New kittens from the feral colony a.k.a. "the army"

2008-08-12T10:45:00.003-04:00

My mom lives in rural Ohio and has become a cat lady, by no choice of her own. People are always abandoing cats on or near our property and they always find their way to her. The neighbors also have barn cats they refuse to fix (which is annoying as all get out) so, my mom's yard has become a feline paradise and she feeds them twice a day, attempts to get them medical care and we are working to get all the females spayed. Not an easy task since many of these cats are untouchable. Sigh...

A whole pile of ratlings... err, I mean kittens!
They are so goofy looking when they are this small.

This one my mom has started calling "the ghost"

My smart bumps aren't so smart...

2008-08-11T19:08:00.001-04:00

For as long as I can remember I've had 3 tiny little bumps on my scalp. In the last 2 years they have grown in size and been joined by three neighbors. In the last 3 months, they have become large enough to be annoying, and get irritated/painful when I comb my hair.

I don't know about you, but bumps on my body kinda freak me out. Especially on my head. I of course used the treatment method of "search for it on the internet and self diagnose, then ignore if not life threatening." This past month I gave up and had them checked. My doctor and I agree that we think they are sebaceous cysts or epidermal cysts (Good lord don't google that for pics, unless you have a strong stomach)

The definition of wat these are from about.com is "A sebaceous cyst is a closed sac occurring just under the skin which contains a "pasty" or "cheesy" looking substance. A foul odor is also often present in the substance called keratin which fills sebaceous cysts. Keratin is a protein that creates the sac of cells called sebaceous cysts. The bumps or lumps you can feel under your skin are actually the sac of cells. "

Gross, huh?

Well, now I get the joy of having my first official surgery and the bumps and I will be parting ways on Aug. 18. I'm not a fan of needles or sharp objects being pointed towards my head so this should be fun.... gag

I am debating taking pics or video of the process and posting them here, because it would be fun to gross out the internet. But, then again, it might gross me out too much personally. We'll see.

Presenting: Fat Girl Gets Fit

2008-08-06T12:19:00.002-04:00

Part of me is excited to be open and honest with you all about this part of my life, and the other part of me is scared to death you will judge me so harshly I'm gonna want to crawl in a hole and die. But, you only life once and life is an experiment. If I hate this, I can always get ride of it.

Here's my new blog (for those that want to follow the loss of the fatness) Fat Girl Gets Fit.

I joined Weight Watchers... or, how the fat girl became just "chubby"

2008-08-05T13:41:00.003-04:00

I know I will never been barbie-skinny, but I do need to lose some of the junk in my trunk to get healthy. I started by getting a personal trainer at the gyma little over a year ago (which I am getting back into) and now I've joined Weight Watchers at work. My lardy-butt will be counting the points on everything that slips past my lips (and promptly migrates to my thighs) in hopes of getting down to just being a kinda chubby, cute chick in flips flops.

Right now I am struggling. I hate having to look up everything I eat and figuring out what the points are. It's kinda tedious. I'm sure that part gets more intuitive and easy as time goes on, or at least I HOPE it does.

I'll also be starting a second blog where all you curious onlookers can see what I've been eating and how much I've lost. (no, you don't get to know my exact weight, just the ups and downs pounds-wise) Nothing like having the entire internet to hold you accountable. Perhaps this will guilt me into behaving? We'll see how it goes. Watch for the link later this week.

Thought for the day...

2008-08-03T11:47:00.002-04:00

I have a few friends who think i should take a 6 month break from guys. Why? 9 months ago i broke up with my fiancee whom i had been dating for 6 years. He was cheating, alot. Then about 4 months ago i had a short dating thing that was basically a rebound relationship, i guess. It was short, really flirty and kinda outta character for me. (he was a bit of a wild child in some ways that I am not)

So... Here I am today.

They think I should take 6 months and focus on me and as one said "figure out how or why I am making bad decisions/choices on guys." And kinda figure out what I really want outta life in general.

I guess part of me thinks this is a good idea, but another part of me really doesn't want to. I'm talking to people (guys and gals, some I've known from the past and am catching up with, some who are new and I'm just getting to know. I kinda lived in a 2-person bubble for far too long (6 years) and cut people out as friends when I shouldn't have. I think as long as I look at it from that point of view, I'm being sensible and focusing on me, in a way that I didn't while I was with G. I'd call that a very good thing.

Besides, I'm 29 and need to live life, not put it on hold. Just need to take things slow, think before acting and try and be smart about the choices I make. :-)

How i will survive the day...

2008-07-31T08:45:00.000-04:00

Massive ammounts of coffee.

Mystery sock....

2008-07-30T22:08:00.001-04:00

Dear person walking around with one sock on at work - hope you don't get a blister!

Boogie down and get funky...

2008-07-28T17:11:00.003-04:00

This guy was totally jamming to some tunes at the bus stop. He had on a white Michael Jackson glove and everything. Kinda reminds me of the MJ guy freom the laudromat onetime when I was in the old apartment. I'll have to post that story on here someday... LoL

Frustrated...

2008-07-25T13:42:00.004-04:00

"people wear masks and its not till you start to feel for that person that the true face starts to show through............get use to it "

What the heck is the quote above supposed to mean? Someone posted it in their blog supposedly in reference to me. (At least I assume that because they kind of texted me the same thing)

I don't think I am ever anything other than me around anyone. Granted, I let myself go and be more goofy around some people, but it's still me.

~sigh~

I wish they would just explain! In English!

And this weekend I got attacked....

2008-07-23T18:26:00.001-04:00

...by a kitten!

Why I love my cousin...

2008-07-23T18:20:00.001-04:00

How many people do you know who spank their chicken when they shake and bake? LoL

And then she shake and baked it!

Fat Princess - Seriously?

2008-07-18T09:39:00.004-04:00

There is a new game that is supposedly coming out for PS3 called "Fat Princess." There's info about it on the PlayStation US site that backs it up as more than a rumor. (http://www.us.playstation.com/PS3/Games/Fat_Princess)

Seriously people. What are you thinking? Do you think I should pat you on the back because the little villagers still want to save their beloved princess even if she's blown up like a Macy's Day balloon since they last saw her? Should you be applauded for not just killing her off to put her out of her fat misery? Or should I do exactly what I am about to do and tell you this is lame. LAME! Wanna portray someone of size in a better light? Make a smoking hot fat chick (or even just a thick chick) a heroine in one of your games. Or at least make her a character option so I don't always have to pick the waiflike, slutty costume, ginormous fake boobs that would just get in the way, "I look like my wrists would snap in real life and I really need a cookie" girl options you leave me with when playing any sort of video game. Granted, I don't play games that much, but when I do get a chance to kick the butt of my guy pals, I'd like to do it in style! I'm sure Les Toil would be more than willing to concept something suitable for the gaming industry if they don't have any artists that can acknowledge curves. (He makes fat women look like cartoon goddesses! Thanks to him, Peter Paul Rubens and Fernando Bottero I was first inspired to believe that even though I'm big, I can still be sexy/pretty/hot, whatever you want to call it. )

As you all know I am a fat chick (Hello? If you didn't know, you shouldn't be shocked based on the name of the blog) so I tend to have serious opinions on this kind of thing. Doesn't mean that I wouldn't like to be thin(ner), just means I accept who I am no matter what. I'm never going to be a size 2. It's not in my genetics. (They'd have to cut bones out or something LoL)

But, I digress...

Candles poolside...

2008-07-17T10:35:00.004-04:00

Went for a late-night swim yesterday and lit some candles on the deck, so I didn't trip on the steps and to keep away the giant mosquitos. I love swimming by candlelight. So calming! I need to bust out the Tikki torches for next time. Yay!

Pool view...

2008-07-17T10:35:00.003-04:00

I am such a water baby. I love my pool. Just need to make more time to hop in it!

As seen in the Brooklyn Lowes parking lot...

2008-07-15T18:08:00.001-04:00

Beans, beans the musical fruit, the more you eat the more you - help America?

LoL!

hmmm....

2008-07-14T16:30:00.003-04:00

Well, I can officially no longer be called cougar. What did I learn from this experience? Sometimes even if someone is nice, fun and attractive, they can turn into a big turd.

No, wait. Scratch that. I really think I learned that I need to meet soemone that's somewhat more on the same level as I am. Someone who has had some experience on their own and has a better definition on who they are, what they want and where they are headed. Oh, and some emotional maturity and respect would be nice, too.

And I can now say I have officially experienced the millenium way to break up - I was broken up with via a text message. (if you don't count 3 weeks of not saying anything a way of breaking up) Which I kind of count - mentally I checked out over a week ago. I just needed official closure so I didn't feel like a creep if I talked to another guy if the opportunity showed itself. LoL

It's all a path.... and somewhere along it I'll meet the right person at the right time. And that my friends, will make it all worth it.

Until then, I am happy being me.

My new baby..... Blu

2008-07-03T11:52:00.005-04:00

*Disclaimer - I am a cheeseball who grew up with a family that named their cars and anthropomorphized them (a.k.a. gave them human traits) I know this might be strange to you, but that's just how it is. Some of that your family does is probably odd to me, too. I digress...

Well, this week was a sad and happy one in Casa De FlipFlopGirl. We lost a longtime family member as Herr Bugito, the yellow bug,was traded in to hopefully find a new family to be a faithful travelling companion for.

Seriously, from the first day I started driving all I wanted was a cute little bug. He was a great little car, but the technical issues of late were silly for a vehicle that was only 5 years old. (even Consumer Reports say the Bug's reliability is shot and they won't even rate it - otherwise I would ahve totally gone for a little convertible Beetle)

I had to think practically and decided a new car, under warranty, with identical EPA mileage estimates would be the best idea. But, saying goodbye was kind of sad.

And farewell very cool, very fun license plates (Have to think of something new)

But, on the the happy news! Meet Blu, my new 2008 Chevy HHR. This vehicle is totally a male - it's a cross between a car and a truck that my cousin and I call a "cruck," it's a funky blue color called Flash Blue Metallic, which turns kind of purple in the sun, and it has a very fun sunroof.

"Breathe" by Superchick....

2008-07-01T15:31:00.000-04:00

Sometimes you hear a song and it reminds you of a point in your life and you know if that song had been around at that time, it would have been your personal anthem. The new song "Breathe" by Superchick, on their "Rock What You Got" CD is one of those songs for me.

When G and I broke up, everytime I would cry or have uber-negative (And honestly sometimes scary) thoughts, I would just repeat over and over "just breathe, all you have to do is breathe." It didn't make me feel any better, but it helped to calm me down a bit so I could do just that - breathe.

Sometimes I still have to tell myself to Breathe, for a variety of reasons. Most of the time it still works.

Spoiled child moment...

2008-06-27T13:23:00.002-04:00

I feel like a cross between Pretty Woman (I just wanna buy a dress, I have money!) and Veruca Salt in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factor when she's singing "I Want it Now" in the gold egg room.

I know what kind of car I want, and I feel like a spoiled little child because I don't want somethign else. I really, really, really want an HHR. Is this too much to ask for? Apparently, because they can't seem to find one. (other than ugly "looks like an ambulance or a hearse" white, silver or gold ones - ewwww!)

UGH.

I know I sound like a child, but can't help it. It happens sometimes. I guess I'll get over it. LoL

A cougar?

2008-05-30T15:21:00.003-04:00

Someone at work (a guy) called me a cougar yesterday because I'm 29 and dating someone who's 5 years younger than me. What the heck? Does this make me a cougar? It's not like I trolled the bars looking for younger guys.... or that I am only attracted to younger guys. I just met him, liked him and it happened to be that he was younger. It wasn't like "damn, I want me some fine young 24 year old tush!" and that was all I was looking for. LoL I wasn't really looking. He was just there, fun and really, really cute!

Personally, I picture someone in their 40's, who looks younger than her actual age and dresses like a twenty-something, that only hits on young guys in bars. (picture skanky halter tops, mini skirts and heels...that may or may not look good) This is a cougar to me.

People - help me out here before I get a complex. What do YOU define as a cougar?

I practice heliolatry...

2008-05-29T16:15:00.001-04:00

I cannot wait to just sit outside with a good book and soak up some sun in my backyard (or my mom's yard). I wish the weather would even itself out enough to stay warm and nice for more than a day or two. LoL Oh well. Welcome to Ohio, Population: People who hate the weather.

Some days...

2008-05-28T19:00:00.003-04:00

I think I made a mistake again.

I think I did what I always do.

I think I'm gonna be made a fool.

Somedays I wish for a life eraser.

Wouldn't that be lovely?

But some things never change...

Easter

2008-05-03T10:46:00.001-04:00

Multimedia message

2008-04-30T20:10:00.001-04:00

Closure....

2008-04-07T18:32:00.001-04:00

I don’t want to be anything other than what I’ve been trying to be lately
All I have to do is think about me and I have peace of mind
I’m tired of looking ’round rooms wondering what I’ve got to do
Or who I’m supposed to be
I don’t want to be anything other than me

~Gavin DeGraw

Ok... mini status update. It’s been 6 months. At first I wasn’t sure of who the heck I was or what I was doing or how I was ever going to make it. (Upheaval in your life, especially the kind you don’t expect, is rough, but it happens. I’m not the first person to ever have been betrayed and had their heart broken, it just felt like that for a while.) But, you know what? Somewhere in the middle I figured it all out. I’m still stressed about the house, but I think I finally have an idea of what the heck I am doing and where I am going and who I want to be. And I *know* I am better off. I know it was the right choice for me.

Now when I go out, I don’t have that constant nagging, worrisome feeling in the pit of my stomach, like I’m being eaten from within. I don’t second guess when someone asks me to do something. I don’t feel like I am cut off from friends and a loner. I don’t feel like the person I love is slowly trying to break me (maybe not intentionally) with comments and criticism. I feel connected and loved and happy.

Yes, this whole debacle has changed who I am and how I look at things, but I don’t think I’m bitter because of it and the scars aren’t so bad. I guess they just add character.

Consider this me, closing the book on this chapter officially. I can’t say it never existed, but I can say it’s done. Goodbye.

You know your week is improving when....

2008-04-03T18:41:00.001-04:00

...when your friends make you laugh so hard you cry serious tears.... And the next day you make them laugh so hard they almost pee their pants. :-)

I mean, seriously, have you ever noticed certain people look like cartoon characters, famous people in the media and ummm.... other people. HAHA I know, we may be going to hell for saying it outloud, but we’re just being honest, not malicious.

And who can resist the hotness of fake redneck teeth! (well, except for maybe the garbage man who almost waved at me till he saw them and the trucker who gave me the confused look) Oh well....

They liked my devil horns, darn it!

God bless my friends. They make life VERY worth living. :-)

I feel out of sorts....

2008-04-01T08:06:00.004-04:00

Today I woke up and started crying. For absolutely no reason. I honestly cannot tell you 100% why it happened. It just did. And the worst thing? I couldn't stop. I just laid there, wrapped my arms around my pillow and let it out. And I was still sniffly and teary when I was driving in to work. Maybe I had a warped out dream or something? It's like a sad little cloud has taken residence in my chest and mind. Now I just feel blah and very sad. Hope I shake this quick today. UGH....

I saved someone's life today...what will you do?

2008-03-18T12:02:00.003-04:00

One of the more annoying traits about me (at least by my ex's standards) is that I tend to enjoy doing things for charity. (No, not for me, for OTHERS via non-profit pursuits) Guess it's just how I was raised and that little part of my soul that hopes when I die, I've done something good in this world.

I try to do at least one thing a month to help out in the community. Last month, it was a donation to the APL, next month, it'll be working the WVIZ auction and raising money for Q104's Pledge for Pets, and I am always working on special charitable events through work. Today it was giving blood.

I tell you this, not to toot my own horn, but to encourage you to do something similar. God gives us all things we can use to help ourselves and others. You can give from three basic categories:

Your Time (volunteering your physical self)
Your Talent (know how to build Web sites? Solicit donations? Create brochures? Sing a wicked song? What you are good at can be used to help)
Your Treasury (money or items with a monetary value)

Giving is not hard. People sometimes forget that giving back isn't all about the money. You can take something you love and turn it into a good deed. Maybe you love dogs, but your current situation doesn't allow you to own one. Volunteer as a dog walker or washer for your local animal shelter.

Cleaning your closets? Donate any unwanted items (in good repair) to the local Salvation Army or Goodwill.

Take giving blood today as an example - Granted, having someone jab me in the arm isn't the most pleasant of things, but it cost me nothing but 30 minutes of my time and a requirement to drink extra water for the next few days. And what does this simple donation of 1 pint of blood do? It can save up to four lives once it's processed into its most simple parts. That's pretty exciting when you think about it.

I'm throwing down a challenge to all of my friends. Over the next 6 months, think of something outside your normal routine and donate SOMETHING from one of the three categories above to a good cause. If you want suggestions or a partner in crime, ask me. Oh, and if you feel motived, post something about your experience in your blog as inspiration for the rest of us.

Who knows.... you might feel good and make new friends or discover a new passion. :-)

Blue Canyon for my bday

2008-03-16T10:44:00.002-04:00

The interior is beautiful. Love the different rooms, the huge chairs, the fireplaces, raw wood beams and big windows.

My bday dinner...

2008-03-16T10:38:00.002-04:00

Grandma had sea scallops with sweet pean gnocchi and apple. Loved the sweet/savory contrast and the scallops were perfectly cooked. The flavored gnocchi was a nice change.

I had the pretzel crusted trout. It was delicious. Would certainly get it again. Came with roasted potatoes and spinach, I believe.

More bday dinner....

2008-03-16T10:36:00.002-04:00

The world's largest plate of nachos. The chips were thick almost like deep friend pitas. I think that's the only think I would have changed about the dish. Because of their size, the chips tended to be a bit greasy and they overpowered the tasty crab, cheese, tomatoes and sour cream that topped them. A lighter, more airy chip or at least a less greasy one, would ahve been nice. They were tasty regardless.

Mom had sea bass on spaetzel. It was lovely. I could have eaten a bowl of the spaetzel all by itself.

Redneck kitty

2008-03-16T10:14:00.002-04:00

Looking classy in a John Deere collar...

Poor herr bugito 2 wks ago

2008-03-16T10:12:00.001-04:00

Can't wait till it's like this every day

2008-03-16T10:08:00.001-04:00

My, what a BIG burrito you have...

2008-03-16T10:07:00.002-04:00

Are you gonna throw it at me or eat it?

Guess you're gonna eat it! That's way more than a mouthful. One, two, three ole! Don't forget the smuggled limes and lemons. ;-)

Hmmmm...

2008-03-14T21:26:00.002-04:00

Still life with limes....

Yes...

2008-03-14T20:07:00.002-04:00

I still am one of the stupidest people i know. At least i can admit it. Blah. Old people should not be impulsive and take the advice of song lyrics. That should be reserved for the young who don't know any better. C'est lavie...

My monkey has a lobster costume....

2008-03-13T16:50:00.002-04:00

You are jealous, I know. Don't be a hater.

She's a cannibal!

2008-03-10T21:53:00.001-04:00

Crazy snowpiles at work

2008-03-10T19:23:00.001-04:00

Yuck!

2008-03-09T00:02:00.001-05:00

More yuck!

2008-03-09T00:01:00.001-05:00

too much snow

2008-03-08T17:40:00.002-05:00

Stupidity thy name is flipflopgirl...

2008-03-03T08:50:00.001-05:00

Sometimes i can be the biggest dumb butt ever. Ugh

Good morning!

2008-03-01T13:40:00.000-05:00

The family playing everyone's fave breakfast game - musical meat!

Birthday craziness

2008-02-24T12:57:00.003-05:00

Tank rapping about something.... or saying "sweet" or "dude"

Giggling cousins. Tater Tot rocks!

We may look like lushes, but most of these didn't even get opened. We just wanted options. (I'm a bartender wanna be and think I am cool and would like to be a mixologist)

The Daily Adventures of a Fat Girl in Flip Flops

Looks funky, but so tasty...

Eleven Things...

Cracks me up....

Photos from Lady Gaga concert

Pizza soup for church soup sale

And she's back...

You can win a kitchen aid mixer (and make me super jealous!)

For those that don't know...

Testing iPhone posting...

Check it out - Lauren's Hope (I know I need one post-WLS)

I'm on a top secret mission...

Things I remember….

Hate on me, hater. Now or later, 'Cuz I'm gonna do me, you'll be mad baby.

I want an instruction manual!

Interesting week....

Dating is fun but it sucks, too.

Illustration Friday - "Hollow"

In a cooking mood...

Dance your ass off! (OMG!)

Somewhat Weekly Observations

Illustration Friday “Craving”

unmentionables...

I couldn't resist...

Weekly observations ('In the News' doesn't cut it)

Fashion trends from CiCi's

Why we're all crazy...

immature giggle..

Reflections on my youth, part 1.

trying this out...

Tradition...

Before I’m 30...

I didn’t grow up there, but I went to school there.

Your help needed: I am DESPERATE for a song....

Since I have over 2,000 views....

procrastination...

Ho Ho Holidays....

Happy German Girl!

Use your power, go vote!

I don’t think I will ever grow out of...

Reveille, Brut cologne and overalls...

Mullet alert!

Bathroom confidential...

And to all you Joe 6 packs out there....

Playing with balls...

American badass....

fashion advice from the fashionably unfashionable...

Got peach butt?

"Oh crap!"

Oh how I love thee, let me count the ways!

Just pondering out loud...

Multimedia message

More Harry pics and video...

Looking for a home: Mr. Harry Houdini

New kittens from the feral colony a.k.a. "the army"

My smart bumps aren't so smart...

Presenting: Fat Girl Gets Fit

I joined Weight Watchers... or, how the fat girl became just "chubby"

Thought for the day...

How i will survive the day...

Mystery sock....

Boogie down and get funky...

Frustrated...

And this weekend I got attacked....

Why I love my cousin...

Fat Princess - Seriously?

Candles poolside...

Pool view...

As seen in the Brooklyn Lowes parking lot...

hmmm....

My new baby..... Blu

"Breathe" by Superchick....

Spoiled child moment...

A cougar?

I practice heliolatry...

Some days...

Easter

Multimedia message

Closure....

You know your week is improving when....